Monday, March 30, 2009

The Haunting

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At first, A-Rod thought it was just the Scientologists coming to recruit him – but why the recurring nightmares? Then he realized…there was...

How To Jerk Yourself Off While Being Globally Warmed

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There’s the semi-automated way… The solo method… Or with a ‘carbon neutral’ buddy… Or… The “Earth Hour” circle jerk… …dramatized by Time ...

Pole Position

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This Is A Trick

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We’re the ones who are toast,...

We Had To Do It: Honorary Moron Of The Week

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Hey, don’t shoot the messenger.

NOOOOooooooooooo, This Can’t Be: Another Apprentice Bites The Bag

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Apprentice candidate Lorraine Tighe has been questioned as part of an £8million fraud investigation. The 36-year-old single mum, whose descr...

Put Your Clothes On, Honey, And Get Out Of That Cage: You've Got Some WORK To Do!!!

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"Today the nonprofit Center for Consumer Freedom (CCF) published documents online showing that People for the Ethical Treatment of Anim...

Terms Of Endearment

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Jenny McCarthy took time out from her intense advanced medical research to answer People magazine’s question “Who was your first date for a ...

The "Race" To The Bottom (Of The I.Q. Chart)

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How come white people see things that other minorities don't see? White folks see all kinds of shit. U.F.O.s, monsters - the Loch Ness M...
Sunday, March 29, 2009

We Can At Least Agree She's Nothing But Trouble

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"I would prefer it be called an act of nature or an act of the Goddess." -- Christina R. Olague , San Francisco Planning Commissi...

Another Mr. Hope 'N' Change Hits A (Blue) Wall

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"Not a lot of love lost between Oakland Mayor Ron Dellums and the families of the four slain police officers who were laid to rest Frid...

The Perfect Excuse For Everything Because - SURPRISE - He's Never Stepped In To Stop Shit

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"I always respected him as my father and he is my father. He never spoke about,...why we were doing it. Sometimes I would ask him and h...

That's A Damn Good Start, Senator: Now Show The Voters If You Know How To "Raise The Roof"

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"Well, your wife said the same thing." -- Sen. Charles Grassley (R-Iowa, above) delivering TMR to Budget Committee Chairman Ken...