The way betrayal cascades through society, I'd thought we'd have understood this by now:
“We’re all susceptible to cheap grace. Perhaps that’s why we’re so eager to bestow it on others. Failure is embarrassing. Shame is unbearable. We want to close the worst chapters of our lives as quickly as possible and just get on with living on the same trajectory as before, minus the embarrassment. Such an outlook, however, neglects true repentance — invariably to our detriment.”
And the destruction of the ones you loved, and left behind,...
Hey, I'm still trying to get over being so shitty to Doreen __ one day during second grade recess that I made her break down in tears.
ReplyDelete40 odd years later, and I still catch myself wondering if she is alright (her family moved the next year) and why on earth did I have to be so fucking mean and do that? I could have gone after the bullies instead after all -- why did I single out her?
And that's just the starter course in my otherwise mean, miserable, no good life.
PTSD? I'd be more worried if somebody didn't suffer from it.
PW