There's 2 Things In Life (And I Paid My Taxes Already,...)

I think "nobody wants to live alone" is right up there with "nobody wants to die" as one of the dumbest things people, who lead sheltered lives, can say. When you've been hurt, you do want to live alone. (No, please, invite your torturers back in,...) And when you've been hurt, you do want to die. Why would anyone think differently?

Oh yeah - because they're usually the ones causing the pain. 

It's like that TV show, Enlightened, except instead of a single NewAger driving every normal person within reach crazy, this is Unenlightened, the story of individuals who can't escape a world of crazy NewAgers - and the results of their outlandish, and ever-changing beliefs - without dying. Oh, whatever happens to me, make sure that continues. 

 No, I laid down the other day and, whenever it happens, I'll be more-than-happy to do so again. I have no interest in "going long" for a life filled with idiotic jabber about feminism, environmentalism, alternative medicine, gay rights, or whatever these morons think the word "energy" means. Oprah's an exploitive bitch - not my moral icon - and there also is no karma, crystals have no powers, and putting con men, posing as psychics, on television is a crime - period. 

I'll gladly die, rather than act otherwise: 

 I already live alone,...

Cry, Bitch

Now's the time for angry tears, baby:

HBO canceled its critically acclaimed dramedy “Enlightened” Tuesday evening. The show, which chronicled the cringe-inducing “recovery” of a business executive scrambling to put her life back together after an office meltdown, offered a searing critique of both the self-help industry and the corporate workplace.

Damn it - I was afraid of this: 

 Trying to make a NewAger a hero - even in her own mind - isn't going to cut it as "a searing critique". 

   

 Just as the great cult film Martha Marcy May Marlene unfortunately left out the most important information for deciphering the issue (my same criticism about the "Will & Grace" debate surrounding gays) the half-assed dramedy approach to exploring NewAge - instead of going for the jugular - just doesn't carry us deep enough into their delusions to ring true.

   

 “Enlightened” was a start, for television, though:

When I began this blog it was almost impossible to find any criticism of NewAge from the world of entertainment, but not anymore.

   

In “Enlightened” we saw NewAgers for what they are:

Troubled - and trouble - for all around them. 

Through Amy Jellicoe's parents, lovers, co-workers - and anyone else who doesn't buy into the vapid evangelical's empty belief system's insane promises - we finally explored (and this is a big one to me) a NewAger acting as a Nazi, committing multiple acts of revenge on those around her - usually in secret - for their heresy. It's laughable, sure, but how that translates into a comedy - or even a "dramedy" - I'm not sure. I told you, reality is settling in again, so it's really not funny. There are, literally, billions of these people out there, turning life into a horror show for everybody else - get real:

It's time for angry tears,...

 

Everything's Going My Way

So I'm writing you from San Francisco, where I've finally returned after 5 years, to collect my things, see old friends, and celebrate my birthday (yesterday). It's been great, and I'm leaving for home today, driving a huge U-Haul loaded with my recording equipment, and looking forward to the work I'm about to create with it - again, finally. Lots of things are about to change.

In the meantime, I thought I'd catch you up on how everyone's latest favorite NewAge nut job, Laura Dern's Enlightened character Amy Jellicoe, is faring in her series' second season. Let's see:

 Still crying over destroying a relationship. 

 Still crying over messing up at work. 

 Still going off, and still blaming her completely uncalled-for explosions on anyone and everyone convenient, rather than her own immature outlook. 

 Which means nothing has changed and the show's still very realistic. Please make a note of it:  

I'll see you when I get my stuff back over the Sierra's,...

 

SUPACULTAFUCKINGNEWAGESUPACOOLADOCIOUS

Had you guys heard of Enlightened, HBO's NewAge dramedy with Laura Dern? I didn't, and it looks pretty good. All the appropriate contradictions appear to be in place, including - and especially - the raging hostility at the world, hidden under the all-purpose Peace-and-Love platitudes. They got me.

Self-delusion. Delusion as to the nature of others. Delusion as to the nature of reality. All the bases are covered by the lead character, Amy Jellicoe. Other than revealing more about the "holistic treatment facility" she was in - and snapping her - I really don't know what HBO can be doing better.

But let's not snap her too soon,...