Standing *Alone* Before A Sea Of Incompetence

Susan Boyle on Britain Got Talent
by dwarthy

Though I'm no longer doing this blog alone, I'm going to drop the royal "we" for the moment and speak to you as a single individual again - as The Crack Emcee - the "genius" artist no one will back because, lordy, I have some unwavering sense of right and wrong that I'll defend to the end of my days. That bothers some people - the evil curs, of course - and especially those who only know me from this blog; who have never seen or heard me perform, or even so much as speak in my own voice. Whatever. You will. And, like this audience seen listening to Susan Boyle, I know you're going to have your assumptions thrown back at you in the most amazing manner you won't believe it possible. I've said it before and I'm saying it again now:

I'm that fucking good.

I love this clip. Because of the way these people, who know nothing - who are doing nothing - but, still, think of themselves as hot - hot enough to laugh at Boyle and shake their heads. Listen to the comments of the judges:

"They were all laughing at you."

"This audience was totally against you."

And for what? Because Susan Boyle isn't superficially pretty. She isn't trendy. She isn't anything from the gutter of cultural artifice this audience has erected, and demanded be respected, in order to "make it". That audience's only saving grace is, thankfully, they recognized The Real Thing when they heard it.

I know how it sounds but this blog is written by The Real Thing as well. I'm trotting out my old reviews to prove it. (Look online: you won't find any bad ones.)

But, as badly as I want to prove it, I'm in no rush to be your performing monkey because - seriously - look at the reaction to Susan Boyle at the beginning of this video and ask yourself: Are those people worth trying to make happy? Those ignorant shallow fools who laughed at her because, like me, she stands out - for not being like them? (Who, in their right mind, would aspire to be kind to so many who can, willingly, be so cruel?) I know who I am: whether the subject is music or cultism, you need me more than I need you.

One of these days, I, too, will be standing on stage again. But unlike Susan Boyle, I won't be looking for your applause but to teach you a lesson - about yourselves. About how much damage you've done to all that is good and right, and what the meaning of talent, beauty, and freedom really are. I haven't been asking any of you to like me and I won't then either. But you will respect me. I won't have to demand it. It'll be obvious from the moment I hit your ears.

You don't have to "believe" me: You've been gorging on junk for so long, to me, it's going to be waaay too easy. There is no competition - only cultists and their admirers.

And that's no fucking competition at all.