Clowns To The Left Of Me, Jokers To The Right

We know what you're thinking:

Those damn Conservatives with their guns,...

Who do they think they are?

We're painted to be Darth Vader.

Cloaked in black,...

Breathing heavy,...

Ready to strike at any moment.

And you know what?

You're right.

We're the folks who aren't lying down for anybody.

That doesn't mean we don't want to have fun,...

Or even get weird from time to time.

Really weird.

We do, and how.

But we also know there's a time for play and a time for seriousness.

For mature adults, there are limits.

We have responsibilities to our country, to ourselves, and to our families.

We're not Liberals.

We've seen our numbers go up and we've seen our numbers go down,...

We don't get help from the media,...

But Conservatives have already crawled to the top after a long stay in the wilderness.

We've been too high to fall too far at this point.

Especially when we've reduced Liberals, now, to only getting lucky every 20 or so years.

That's the funny thing.

No, really funny.

We know more about Liberals than the other way around - and you think we're finished!

You forget: We've been there.

We know what you like.

How about us?

Think we're a group of stuffy old white guys?

Or haven't you got a bigger problem?

You're blind as bats.

You can't see.

We've been right in front of your eyes your whole life.

Keeping things together, while you whine and protest, waiting for the rest of you to grow up.

We're America's Conservatives.

The folks without stars in our eyes.