Zen And The Art Of Stupid Shit

"The Dalai Lama is yet another jerk finding a silver lining in the financial crisis."

-- Amy Alkon, not exactly grooving on this whole NewAge thing in a crisis - SINCE THIS WHOLE NEWAGE THING IS THE CRISIS - and even though she's called The Advice Goddess.

And, oh man, we love this:

There was Melanie Strickland, 48, a substitute teacher from the Joshua Tree area. Moments after the Dalai Lama left the stage, she was reciting large portions of the teachings -- nearly verbatim -- over her cellphone to a friend.

"The key is to rise above thoughts of pain and anger," she told her friend, "and focus on the here and now between those thoughts. See?"

Yes, rise above how your child is hungry for dinner, but you can't quite afford it because you and your husband are both out of work. Do your best, 'kay?