Today At 5PM Pacific Time: The Crack Emcee Is On "My Perspective With Constance Cumbey"

We told you about it once before and now we're telling you again:

The Crack Emcee is doing an interview about NewAge cultism on "My Perspective With Constance Cumbey". Find out if TMR's big guy is crazy - or just crazy for doing it - at 5PM Pacific Time. You get big points if you listen in and make an .mp3 we can post.

You can tune in here.

Constance is a Christian and a conspiracy theorist (we are not) but she's still a lawyer, an expert on NewAge beliefs, and a really nice lady, so it ought to be a fun conversation.

UPDATE: So it was a fun conversation! Constance Cumbey is very well versed in NewAge, asked good questions (her callers as well) and has invited The Crack Emcee back for another go in two weeks! Stay tuned,...

Announcement: TMR Is Boldly Going Where No Atheist Blog Has Gone Before: Christian Radio

This Tuesday, March 31st, at 5PM Pacific time, The Crack Emcee will be doing a live interview* about TMR and the NewAge Movement on "My Perspective with Constance Cumbey". You can listen in here:

Be sure to bookmark it.

*Constance Cumbey is a well-known Christian Anti-NewAge activist, so we'll be speaking with her about the blog - it's history, perspective, and concerns - but not in the language of the site. Translation:

It'll be our dawg's day out with a leash on - no swearing.

From Wikipedia:

Constance Cumbey is a lawyer and activist Christian author.

She graduated from the Detroit College of Law, now known as the Michigan State University College of Law in 1975 with a Juris Doctor degree. Prior to her graduation she served as a legislative analyst to speaker of the Michigan House of Representatives, William A. Ryan from 1969 to 1970. In 1971 she was selected as one of 24 National Urban Fellows finalists in a national campaign to find promising urban administration talent.

Cumbey began law school in 1972. Prior to that, she served on the Speaker's Staff of the Michigan House of Representatives, holding the title of "Administrative Assistant and Legislative Analyst to the Speaker of the House." She was one of nine members of that staff. While attending law school, she was employed as a consultant to the Governmental Efficiency Subcommittee of the Appropriations Committee for the Michigan State Senate. She was the first Charter appointee as Executive Assistant to the mayor of the City of Highland Park, Michigan from 1970 to 1972.

Cumbey has been a practicing attorney since 1975, has served as a national officer for the National Association of Women Lawyers, and was before writing her books, an active a member of the American Bar Association. Since returning to the active practice of law in the 1980s, she is an active member of the Macomb and Wayne County Bar associations as well as the mandatory State Bar of Michigan affiliation. She was appointed in 2003 to serve a three year term by the president of the State Bar of Michigan, Tom Ryan, to plan future State Bar meetings. She has continuously been re-appointed to the Public Advisory Committee of the State Bar of Michigan since 1978. They rate judicial candidates for Wayne County and statewide for the Michigan Court of Appeals and Michigan Supreme Court.

From 1992 to 2004, she hosted a popular Detroit radio program known as Law Talk on a Christian station. She does frequent national and international radio interviews, i.e., Israel National Radio, on various topics. She currently hosts an internet radio talk show on www.TheMicroEffect.com and is a columnist for www.NewswithViews.com.



Cumbey began a secondary career as a researcher and writer in 1981, to write about the New Age movement. She gave up her law practice for a while to dedicate herself to writing and public speaking to this end. Her books have been translated into German, Norwegian, and Dutch.

Cumbey's work is presently in the process of archival by the University of Michigan's Bentley Historical Library.

Cumbey's book, The Hidden Dangers of the Rainbow, was one of the earliest writings from a fundamentalist Christian perspective concerning New Age spirituality. Her rejection of New Age spirituality was based on her understanding of Christian teachings regarding the role of Christ as saviour, and of Biblical prophecy. She has also promoted several conspiracy theories in her writings, including the claim that the European Union's foreign policy chief Javier Solana could be the Antichrist.

Good times!!

Talking Through That Whole On My Neck

Fine. I'm done. You knew it was going to come to this, didn't you? I named the blog right. Look at the title again.

Or here, let me lay it out for you, nice and simple like:

You're. All. Fucking. Wrong.

I've been dancing around saying that for such a fucking while, even I've wondered what's taken me so long.

You're wrong. All of you. You don't know shit, and what you think you know isn't worth much, because you're not sure.

I'm sure. You can hear it in my voice - even in the voice I write with: I'm sure of everything I'm fucking saying, and what I'm saying most loudly is YOU'RE WRONG.

Let's start with the so-called "big stuff": there is no God. I'm not going to fight with you about it, or try to prove otherwise, because there's no point: there is no God.

Let Richard Dawkins pull together his PowerPoint demonstration for you, making the "atheists" proud in the face of your stupidity. That's not for me. I'm just going to state it as plainly as I can, one more time, and move on:

There-is-no-God.

Wait a minute - I'll go a little further: Constance Cumbey, you're a lawyer, and the fact you waste your time chasing NewAge nonsense to justify "Biblical scripture" is below you, and everyone who hears you. You're no different than that silly woman who "facilitates recovered memories" and claimed John Bolton (the U.S. Ambassador, not the treacly musician) yelled at her 20-something years ago. You all need to stop. Now. Get a life. Get a real one. Jesus doesn't need you anymore.

Oh, and while I'm at it (and before I move on) a quick message to my ex-wife who thinks (giggle) she's a four-eyed god: you almost got me, Bitch. But now I think I've finally got you figured out too - you're crazy.

A lot of people tried to tell me that but, silly me, I cared so much. Well I'm over it now. I'm going back to my music, played loud, and if I get it right, you'll hear it in whatever damned "spa" your already-dead ass is forever trying to "relax" in. That's the way I want it, that's the way it's going to be: noise, noise, noise, for the rest of my days. A real racket.

O.K. - I feel better now. Let's move on:

I've already told you McCain's going to be president, so you might as well drop the Obamamania now, because he ain't gonna do it. He ain't "The One". I'm the one:

I'm black, I'm post-racial, and I don't give a shit.

That's what you're looking for.

There's only one problem: I'm not running. Nope. No way, Jose. Anybody who thinks I'm "presidential timber" don't know shit about wood. I got "the right stuff" but the wrong attitude. Why? Because I'm disappointed in all of you and don't want to do it. Didn't I just have to tell you there's no God? Now who in the fuck wants to lead a bunch of idiots who couldn't figure that one out? Oh yea: John McCain.

I'd let him if I were you.

Music sucks. I'ma do what I can to fix that, but right now it sucks, and you people really should demand better. Go to Dylan's house and complain. Rip up the tombstone on Jimi Hendrix's grave - do something. Because if you have to rely on me to save you, with my attitude, your ass might be waiting a mighty long time.

If I have to wade my ass through another group of musicians, it's only going to be because I want to do something, and, considering the way I feel, I just may change my mind. I definitely won't be doing it for you. I'm 47 years old, and the idea of a 47 year old man - especially this one - trying to make somebody happy, depresses me. So, I don't know, throw money or something. There's a donate button over there: use it. Or be left to your own devices for "happiness." I'm all wrung out.

Art? What's "art" now? Bronze statues of Oprah? I don't think so. That's spectacle, just like those Kate Moss Yoga poses, Banksy getting cute, and whatever Michael Jackson's done to his face. Doesn't qualify.

Nothing does. It's over.

Women? What about women? Just asking that question - putting the word "women" with a question mark next to it - is enough to piss 'em off, so who cares?

Didn't they get the memo? I'm hereby declaring all insane people "insane," so if they've already bought their Sex And The City tickets, then damn it go, GO! Leave me the fuck alone.

I'm working here.

Humping Home: From Hay To Hamburg

Did you hear? Jon Blyth is starting a reverse-Louise Hay Fan Club:

"Hi. I don't know if you've heard of me, but I'm the best. I can do anything I want to, and I attract only love. This is because I am a creature of love. Not only that, but the more love I give away, the more I have. Basically, I could fill a barn with vibrations of love.

If I ever heard these words tumble from a mouth, I would pop off and make a cup of tea, just so I could come back and drop it in horror. People know it doesn't make sense, that's why meaningless, self-congratulatory rubbish like this is usually hidden away. People who hurl upbeat but confusing imagery at themselves usually keep it restricted to a bedroom mirror.

The quotes from the first paragraph were based on genuine affirmations by Louise L Hay, author of books detailing the powers of self-actualisation and, if her Amazon reviews are anything to go by, commander of a devoted legion of empowered fragile souls. I dislike Hay,..."

Oh goodie: where do I sign up? (And doesn't Louise Hay have a creepy I-eat-children smile?)

Did you know there's a connection between the twisted views of Louise Hay, Sharon Stone, Al Gore, and that crazy preacher, Joseph Hagee? Check it out:

"I heard Gore on NPR the other day. He was asked what he made of evangelical pastor Joseph Hagee's absurd comment that Hurricane Katrina was God's wrath for New Orleans' sexual depravity. Naturally, Gore chuckled at such backwardness. But then the Nobel laureate went on to blame Katrina on man's energy sinfulness."

Paging Constance Cumbey. Paging Constance Cumbey,...Will Constance Cumbey report to the White Courtesy Telephone, please:

Miss Cumbey? God told me to tell you to set up a debate, between Al Gore and the President of Czechoslovakia, Vaclav Klaus. (Above) God says it's something about the Green Agenda. God also says he'd do it himself but he's too busy making me blog.

The White House is going after the New York Times because - honestly - it's becoming painfully clear I don't have that kind of pull. If I did, they wouldn't write articles for the fashion section that start like this:

"JILL BOLTE TAYLOR was a neuroscientist working at Harvard’s brain research center when she experienced nirvana.

But she did it by having a stroke."

Then, all of a sudden:

“That’s it,” the therapist said. “That’s it, and that’s big.”

Her therapist? That Queer Eye For A Stroke Guy. (Yea, I know: booo! Back off, I'm trying something new here:)

Next up: A lady moved to France. Her husband had an affair. She didn't like it. Told you: those people are crazy.

And finally:

Is Homeopathy "New Science" or "New Age"?

I hear it's just water, but nobody's sure, because leading British pharmacists sell it. We are sure Yoga and horoscopes can lead to possession by the Devil, but you'll have to ask the Germans:

They've known more about the NewAge than almost anybody.

What NewAgers Say When You're Listening

This is Constance Cumbey and - have no doubt - she's a Christian. A Christian who got turned on to NewAge long before I did, but who's also had a very-similar experience: specifically, a chance to hear of their hopes and dreams - from their own mouths - before they knew we didn't share them.

I can attest that this is how NewAgers talk in private. These are their beliefs and goals. They are occultists, and, like all believers, they're reacting in accordance to (or for-and-against) certain religious symbols - symbols the average secularist or atheist pays no mind, as they focus like-a-laser on the Christian beliefs they grew up with.

It's not exactly in the NewAger's interests to admit what they're trying to do - they'd be crazy to admit helping an Anti-Christ to appear - even to an atheist. It's much more beneficial just to say they don't like organized religion, or they're "spiritual not religious," without revealing what that actually means. Or (religiously-speaking) what that impulse's history, from Paganism onwards, has been.

While I personally don't believe in an Anti-Christ, anyone who understands Christianity should be able to grasp that NewAgers are acting within occult beliefs: imagining themselves as gods (when Christians say there's only supposed to be one) trying to re-define evil downwards (because they don't like Christianity's rules defining "good" behavior) etc. That's how the road to NewAge is illuminated. It's the "sophisticated" embrace of evil. Why, you could even say that, since atheists haven't been taking NewAgers as seriously as Christians, they've actually been giving "the dark side" a helping hand.

Yes, NewAge is the dark side of Christian belief (because no form of spirituality can be called atheism) and anyone old enough to have witnessed publishing's re-branding of books - from "occult" to "New Age" to "Mind/Body" - should be able to grasp how far it's been allowed it to go. (Look at the popularity of Oprah's Book Club: what is she primarily selling again?)

Make no mistake: NewAgers are busy, dancing around their golden calf, while playing everyone - believers and, especially, non-believers - for fools. To NewAgers, the most important part of a non-believer's foolishness is our most deeply-held, and rock-solid, assumption about the nature of ourselves as people:

That we've been too damn smart for religion.

I, for one, think it's long past time for society to pay attention to the kind of "spirituality" NewAgers really believe in - as a final way for all of us, atheists and Christians alike, to prove them wrong.

See? As NewAge has been proving for years: it can provide for the very-strangest of bedfellows.