Taking Them To School (For A Proper Education)

"After seeing the responses that threads about the Bible, voodoo, and circumcision always get, I'm certain that most people are irreversibly gullible and superstitious.  There was a time when I cared about helping people learn actual shit about the real world, but fuck that.  I want to make some money and starting a cult is a piece of cake.
 
You just find some emotionally vulnerable people with little to no education and start making ridiculous promises that can't really be disproven because they involve undetectable spiritual realms or events that happen after death or whatever else you want to throw in there.  It doesn't matter how stupid it is.  Large numbers of people will believe anything that a charismatic person says.
 
Make sure you program the persecution complex in there.  That way, when the skeptics inevitably start calling you out on your bullshit, your followers will rush to defend you.  Perhaps they'll even use violence!  Hooray!  Now you've got ultra-loyal bodyguards, worshippers to boost your ego, lots of money, and basically all the women are your harem, no Elijah Muhammad.
 
Then you buy some politicians and you're set for life."

-- "niggasislikeohmygodnotyou", declaring "My goal in life is to be a cult leader" in the comments section of the Hip-Hop blog called The Ill Community.

You gotta love it: the next post asks, "What you gonna base it on?"