Raising A Smile Today Is As Easy As Acknowledging 'We Don't Have Long Left'

THIS IS WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU'RE MARRIED TO AN EMPATH:

  How Gavin Newsom made California's paradise into purgatory 

   

 NO SOAP OR WATER NEEDED:

  2 Psychologist-Approved Docu-Series Depicting How Cults Brainwash 

   

 AGAIN WITH THE ALIENS - ALWAYS WITH THE ALIENS:

  ‘Profundity Yours’ is a new cult in Texas, according to TikTok, and the fake language they speak is just the beginning

HE WAS ALREADY READY FOR HIS CLOSE-UP:

  ‘Devil on Campus’ portrays ‘sociopath’ sex cult leader

MAKE THE POPE SAY 'FAGS' AGAIN:

  Pope Francis has lost control of his liberal revolution

OOOH BABY I LIKE IT RAW:

  How milk became the new culture war dividing America

PRINCE - YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO SAY PRINCE:

  Ariana Grande Once Told a Young Fan Her Dream Dinner Date Would Be with Jeffrey Dahmer: 'I Have Questions'

'OUR' BETTER INCLUDE 'MINE' BECAUSE THEY'VE GONE TO SHIT:

  Gen Z's widening gender divide has turned political. It's ruining our relationships.

I'M WAAAY AHEAD OF YOU BUT GO AHEAD:

  21 Incredibly Dark Cults That Will Make You Question Humanity

CULTS ARE WHERE YOU LEARN THE LIMITS OF FAMILY:

  Family desperate for return of relative who joined 7M, 'brainwashing cult' behind viral TikTok dancing videos

SORRY SURI - SCIENTOLOGY:

  Tom Cruise attends Taylor Swift’s Eras Tour in London day after daughter Suri’s high school graduation

THE TWO-BY-TWOS:

  FBI is investigating a secretive religious sect after child sex abuse allegations spanning decades

YES - THAT DRESS MAKES YOU LOOK FAT:

  Summer Without Sex: Celibacy all the rage right now? 

   

 NOW HE STAYS EVEN LONGER:

  FRENCH ‘CULT LEADER’ ARRESTED FOR 3-MONTH OVERSTAY IN KOH PHANGAN

SEE YOU NEXT WEEK:

  Chiropractic maintenance care: sly scare mongering of greedy chiropractors to fleece vulnerable individuals.

THIS IS A BADLY-WRITTEN HEADLINE:

  New Documentary Based on Books by Journalist Mike Rothschild in the Works on the History of AntiSemitism

PSYCHICS AND RELIGION ARE BACK - AS EVERYTHING TILTS RIGHTWARD:

  The Man Softening the Ground for an Extremist Germany

Cult Survivor Headlines Are More Colorful Than Watching Parrots Eating Crayons

GERMANY IS WHERE ALL THIS WATERLOGGED MADNESS BEGAN:

WOW! The German Medical Association bans homeopathy

YOGA IS STAYING HARMLESS:

Survivor of ‘Escuela de Yoga’ cult helps bring down the human trafficking sect he escaped from 

   

  SHE'S FINE WITH DEATHS AFTER SPREADING "THE SECRET" BUT NOT THIS:

Oprah Winfrey regrets her contribution to 'diet culture,' admits she set unrealistic standards 

   

  FINE - HIT YOURSELF IN THE HEAD WITH A HAMMER:

Dear Abby: My husband wants me to ‘forget’ his 20-year-long affair 

   

  FROM MEDICINE TO NEWAGE QUACKERY TO "DIY" WELLNESS:

Hospitals’ new message for patients: Stay home

IMAGINE - ABANDONING BELIEFS AS "THE BEST DECISION":

"I'm an ex-Jehovah's Witness - I felt shunned by my church after my divorce and leaving was the best decision for me"

THE CULT MOM'S "MAGIC MAN" HAS FINALLY LOST HIS POWERS:

DNA matched to sample found on Daybell's axe

MODERN LIFE'S IMPROVED: Not Quite As Bloody As Before But Just As Stupid

CANCER OF THE EYE: The fake diagnoses of so-called alternative medicine – PART 3

New skeletons perform: 'Cult religion and illegal marketing': HYBE's old skeletons dug up in feud

Yes, they even tell your gullible ass why: ‘Europe has an extraordinary culture of nudity’: Where and why to try a naked yoga retreat 

   

 Based on the evidence, The Specific Type Of Love That's Even Higher Than A Soulmate is a divorced spouse you've repeatedly cheated on.

"Paramount+ has decided to cancel the upcoming docu-comedy series Guru Nation, which was set to feature David Cross and Bob Odenkirk as rival cult leaders." The reason: there are no cults.

Protesters in Germany call for Islamic fundamentalism: 'Caliphate is the solution' Still no word on what the question is, was, or ever will be.

And Russell Brand announces he is getting baptized as a Christian, describing it as an 'opportunity to leave the past behind' - where it usually is - unless it's brought into the present, where he famously wants nothing to do with it, because it was probably, ok definitely, underage when they originally met.

 

Too Hot To Handle

 

 Israeli Denounces the Occupation at the Knesset 

   

 ‘The mood is heating up’: Germany fears strikes will play into hands of far right 

   

 Bizarre moment crazed JetBlue flyer claims he's the DEVIL 

    

 Archaeologists' Pagan Temple Find Challenges History of Roman Christianity

Water Ain't Everything (Flooding New York)

Trail of child brides, sexual abuse, drug trafficking leads to Philippine cult’s ‘baby Jesus’

Democrats Criticize Republicans For Impeaching Biden When He's Dead In A Few Weeks Anyway

MORE ON THE NEW PAT BOONE: Let’s start another war to stop Antony Blinken singing

Ashton Kutcher Is Trying To Get 'His Reputation Out of the Dirt' After Danny Masterson Support

YOU'RE THE FOOL: Pagan lunar worship has reached a new generation thanks to TikTok

QUOTE OF THE DAY: "The Apache were seldom found hunting buffalo through Berlin"

 

You're Not My Dad

 

US Secretary of State Antony Blinken Morphed Into The New Pat Boone With This Unique Rendition Of Muddy Watters' "Hoochie Coochie Man"

Women Accuse Tim Ballard of ‘Spiritual Manipulation, Grooming, and Sexual Misconduct’ Though, To Be Honest, They Seem To Fall For That A Lot (Ask Russell Brand And A Host Of Others). TMR Strongly Recommends Everybody Find New Interests

German police are investigating Nazi salutes at Oktoberfest because,...come on.

And a Dad fears a Buddhist group brainwashed his son

Bold Opinions (On Madness)

BUSTED - AGAIN: Hunter Biden received $250K wires in Joe Biden's home

NOT SO SECRET: Mayor Adams named ‘Master Mason’ in secret Freemason ceremony

THE FIX IS IN: Chess Champ to Piers Morgan: Your Fixation on Anal Beads Is ‘Concerning’

BEGGING: Colin Kaepernick writes to Jets asking to join team

YOU'D BE ARRESTED FOR THIS: Cher hired four men to kidnap troubled son

SO SOPHISTICATED: France moves homeless people out of Paris

NO MORE STRUDEL: Germany: Study shows former East and West growing apart

THEY GOT THE POINT: 90-year-old acupuncturist charged with sexually assaulting patient

DON'T TELL FUNKADELIC: Canada's Speaker Anthony Rota resigns after Nazi in parliament 

   

 YOGA MONSTERS: “How do you convince someone to actually become normal,...?"

UH-HUH, SURE: Prankster says he didn't know he scared man who ended up shooting him