Gotta Have A Trial Because Nobody Knew It Was Wrong

Vanity Fair is keeping Hitchens' grand example alive:

“Bikram Yoga’s Embattled Founder: The Alleged Rapes and Sexual Harassment Claims Against Guru Bikram Choudhury”

And the NewAge crowd still has very low standards,...

 

Uh (Here We Go, Loopty-Loop, Here We Go, Loopty-Lie)

I'm so sick of this. Somebody seriously needs to call these people and tell them to calm down. Nobody cares, this is "just how we roll" now:

"Bikram yoga founder facing allegations of rape now accused of racism, misogyny, homophobia and running his company 'like a cult'"

Yada-yada-yada. Yeah, yeah, yoga. Gurus are just trying to "control" and "brainwash" people. Sure. Tell me another one. BTW - those three girls who recently "escaped" being some lunatic's life-long sex slaves? We gotta give 'em back. Yeah, it's been decided, under NewAge rules, he, too, got 'em fair-and-square. You know, like Whole Foods shoppers.



Now, go and live a "stress-free" lifestyle, like everybody else.

Of course, it's strongly suggested you take up yoga to do that,...

Every Time I Wave My Flag (Nobody Waves Back At Me)

As I've discovered, like so much outside of ghettos and the good life, society's proven it fully understood what yogic cult training's pitfalls were - before embracing them:

Bikram Choudury, the famously abrasive founder of Bikram hot yoga, has been accused of rape and of encouraging his followers to recruit women he could victimize, according to lawsuits filed by two different women. 

Two separate Jane Does filed suit against Choudury, 67, and Bikram Yoga alleging sexual battery, false imprisonment, discrimination, harassment and seven others counts, according to Courthouse News. Both women, whose identities were not released, filed very similar suits on the same day in the same California courtroom. 

Another former student, 29-year-old Sarah Baughn, filed suit against Choudury in March claiming he sexually assaulted her constantly during her time training to become a yoga instructor in 2005 and has since prevented her from teaching “because of her past and continuing refusal to have sex with the guru.” 

In her complaint filed Monday the second Jane Doe claimed she had been raped in November 2010 after her boyfriend paid for her to be trained as a teacher a Bikram’s San Diego studio. The court documents claimed the attack seemed to be nothing out of the ordinary, reading “other persons in defendant Bikram Choudhury’s inner circle, were aware of defendant Bikram Choudhury’s pattern and practice of causing, inducing or persuading young women to enroll in teacher training classes to become yoga instructors only so he can sexually assault and/or rape them.” 

It also accuses Bikram’s underlings of knowing an attack was inevitable, but says they still “did nothing to prevent this from happening to plaintiff or to protect her.” 

Jane Doe said she “lived in constant fear” of the “cult-like atmosphere” fostered in the organization. Potential instructors are required to pay $13,000 for a nine-week training program, where they’re deprived of communication with the outside world, forced to listen to Bikram’s vulgar rants on sexuality and endure “demoralizing” activity, including urinating on themselves. 

“Plaintiff Jane Doe No. 2’s life unraveled after she returned home,” the suit claims. “Her long term relationship fell apart, she went into a severe depression, attempted suicide, started drinking, doing drugs, engaged in uncharacteristically impulsive behavior, quit her job and cut off communication from almost everyone in her life.”

 

I think the current standard is, if you don't have photos, it didn't happen. [Rimshot] No, wait, wait - if you ask me, with The Vagina Monologues playing everywhere, getting that stretching-is-mystical thing out of everyone's mind will take a little time. [Kidding, kidding - this is all tragic.] But seriously, I think I watch a lot of Nazi movies because I'm still coping with SS Guards-doing-yoga-for-Hitler-hating Americans, in America, allowing frauds to openly manipulate swallowing others whole (and even groups of others) while everybody just stands around:

“With the power and hubris Bikram wielded (and the stories that have been floating around for years) it was almost expected, like we were all just waiting for it to happen.”

 

 "We were all just waiting for it to happen.” Spoken like a real monster. Great incentives, too. Straight from the gutter - with a hearty "Namaste" and (a "spiritual") Good For You! - here's some cud for you to chew on, pimp:

   

See, it's only after someone's identified themselves as a cultist - that is, someone capable of being convinced touching their toes should be considered a smug-inducing accomplishment - that I can understand how anyone in this country "thinks" like that.

   

 And, for some odd reason, it's never a pleasant experience.

Now that I think about it, it rarely follows one either,...

 

Look In My Eyes And Tell Me You Don't Want To Fuck Me

It's always fascinating when the women who take photos, like this, charge a man with sexual harassment. It really bolsters their case of being an innocent party (And what is it with women and nude photos? I've got a billion male friends and, as far as I know, not a one has a single nude photo or glamour shot. But my female friends? They've all got them. I'm talking a behavior, coupled with a narcissistic outlook, so uniform it's impossible to take many of them seriously as individuals.) But - getting back on topic - this sexual harassment charge is no ordinary sexual harassment charge. It's against one of TMR's favorite, and most exploitive, gurus:

Bikram Choudhury, the "hot yoga" dude who's always in the shit (Click his tag below).

 

Did he do it? I'd put good money on it. But was she asking for it? I'd put even more money on it, partially because that photo says she lives in the same goofy look-at-me headspace that he does, and willingly signed up as his "follower" after he's repeatedly been in trouble (See the photo, above, for where that'll get you, every time,...) 

So she gave him what he wanted - or "used what she's got" as the saying goes - and now wants to punish him for it. Can you hear opportunity knocking? Yeah, baby, he's gonna pay. It's all so NewAge - and spiritual - even though we know yoga's only exercise. Fuck: 

 Incarcerate them both - for making life worthless - and throw away the key,...

You Are In My System (Now Please Get-The-Hell Out,...)

August 9, 2012

“Blake Fielder-Civil, ex-husband of Amy Winehouse, is reportedly on life support after he was rushed to a hospital Friday morning in West Yorkshire, England, with multiple organ failure and placed in an induced coma." 

 

March 6, 2010

“'Blake has been trying out all kinds of ways to readdress his life since doing rehab. 

'He's been eating healthily. Then he got heavily into bikram yoga. Now it's Scientology.'"

Gaze Upon That Which You Will Never See Again (After The Coming Election On November 12th)

I almost forgot to tell you:

The Hill has our capital's 50 Most Beautiful People up today. Along with the crazy "raw foodist, bikram yogi" nut Republican, see if you can stand to be in the presence of such outstanding examples of humanity without giving up your lunch. Here's a sample of what you'll find:

"9. Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr.: Still beautiful



Age: 45


Hometown: Chicago


Political party: Democratic


Relationship status: Married



Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr. recently read Eckhart Tolle’s book The Power of Now. The lessons he took from it?



'The past is gone … live in the moment,' Jackson says.



Jackson’s now: He is the co-chairman of the House Members’ Wellness Center and has ushered in sweeping changes. Jackson, a fitness nut, converted one of the gym’s racquetball courts into a space dedicated to martial arts, yoga, Pilates and the P90X exercise program popular with several lawmakers. (Changes were funded by members’ dues, not by taxpayers’, he’s careful to point out.) He donated a blender and juicer so members can whip up protein shakes and other post-workout meals. And he wanders through the members-only space in the mornings to make sure his fellow lawmakers are happy and taking care of their health."

Got that? Jesse Jackson's kid (who looks like a burn victim to me) is another Oprah Winfrey-inspired cultish government "fitness nut" who does yoga while he brainlessly "wanders through the members-only space" spouting NewAge nonsense about "living in the moment". (Which of course means his zombie ass will screw you over, without a care, because that was in "the past",...) Just what we need to get Washington's house in order:

Someone with their priorities straight - who clearly understands why they're there.

Good Lord, these cultists are a disappointment. Now, please, excuse me while I go barf,...

Blake, Listen To Crack: Go Back To Heroin. Now.

"Blake Fielder-Civil has turned to crackers celebrity cult Scientology in a bid to stay clean after rehab.

The ex-husband of AMY WINEHOUSE, who's back with her, is taking a big interest in the oddball organisation which counts TOM CRUISE, JOHN TRAVOLTA and WILL SMITH as members.

A friend said: 'He has been reading lots of Scientology books and researching it on the internet.

'He is seriously thinking about becoming an active member.

'Blake has been trying out all kinds of ways to readdress his life since doing rehab.

'He's been eating healthily. Then he got heavily into bikram yoga. Now it's Scientology.'"

-- The Sun

Portrait of a man who can't handle stimulants. (Kidding.) Wow. I never saw this coming. I thought he was smarter than this. But, if the photo above is any indication, they've really got the whole mind, body, spirit thing working on him something fierce. Oh well, I guess we'll have to wait and see. But we've seen this - the haircut, at least - before:

Here's before it all went so wrong:

Bikram: Yoga Is "Brainwashing" (Hold Still For It)

This is no place for independent thinkers.

"The whole class is one big brainwashing session—washing out bad habits and old patterns that keep you from experiencing mental peace, happiness and a satisfaction in living," [Bikram] Choudhury wrote in his latest book, "Bikram Yoga" (Collins, $24.95).

Choices, are, after all, what get us in trouble, Choudhury often says. When people have choices, they get spoiled or take the wrong road. When you have no choice—like when your Bikram instructor tells you to do something—the only way is obviously the right way.

"America's biggest problem is too much freedom,” he said, said during a brief stop last week at one of his franchised studios in Chicago, Bikram Yoga in the City. “It’s like putting a loaded gun in a child’s hand. Yoga only works one way."

-- Julie Deardorff, being told - to her face - a broad outline of yoga as a very-un-American mind control cult ("When you have no choice"?) and ignoring it because of the positive "spin" he surrounds it with, for the Chicago Tribune.