Daily Mail:"It has been reported that Luz is so smitten by the Material Girl that he has switched to her mysterious Kabbalah faith, despite being a strict Catholic, and has joined an online community for Kabbalah believers.
He has even updated his own website updating friends about the move.
A source told the Daily Mirror: 'Jesus's family are very traditional and quite religious so this news is sure to come as something of a shock.
'But Jesus is totally taken with Madonna and is slightly in awe of her. Quite simply he can't get enough, and finds her utterly compelling and bewitching.
'The pair have spent a lot of time together in recent weeks and Madonna's chatted quite freely about her personal beliefs - especially Kabbalah.'
The source added: 'Madonna has offered to take him to the Kabbalah centre in New York and he is exceedingly keen to take her up on that.'
…She was was apparently so enamoured with the handsome Latino, she asked him to accompany her for the remainder of the South America leg of her Sticky & Sweet Tour."
Don’t worry, A-Roid, this is just publicity and Minge’s sacrifice to save your reputation.
We’ve figured out the two reasons Jesus has his name tattooed on his back:
1) In case he misses his school bus.
2) In case Minge forgets his name while she’s Kabbal-ing him.
On an upbeat note, he’s almost to where he can count his toes.
Also, we have realized the Kabbalah cult embraces lying, cheating, debauchery, greed, hypocrisy, promiscuity, soul-eating, betrayal and bleach blonde hair. And those are Minge’s positive qualities.
It’s near impossible to keep this crap updated.
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