Wake Up, Folks: Losing Is Supposed To Feel Bad

Oh Man, when Saturday Night Live announced Winning! is taking on a whole new meaning, they weren't kidding:

After years of claiming presidential immunity to avoid legal proceedings, Jacques Chirac is finally facing a court.

The former president, a bugaboo for George W. Bush during his rush to war in Iraq, on Monday becomes France's first former head of state to go on trial since its Nazi-era leader was exiled.

That is, if the whole case isn't derailed by a last-minute protest by another defendant.

If the trial goes ahead as planned, Chirac, 78, faces a month in court on charges that he masterminded a scheme to have Paris City Hall pay for work that benefited his political party when he was mayor — before he became president in 1995.

A prison term is seen as highly unlikely, but in principle if convicted, Chirac could be jailed for up to 10 years and fined euro150,000 ($210,000).

France's restive political circles are gearing up for next year's presidential race, but the fallout from this trial is unlikely to hit anyone other than Chirac and the nine other defendants including a grandson of Gen. Charles de Gaulle and a former left-wing labor union leader.

Still, the trial looms as an embarrassing coda to Chirac's 12-year presidential term, potentially denting his legacy, recent philanthropic work and image as one of France's most popular personalities since he left office.

So, let's see, what do we have here:

The supposed ally, who said "We do not agree" during the Iraq War, tormenting the United States and President Bush (who is going through an amazingly positive reassessment) is facing trial for being a cheat and a liar? And wasn't it France's position during the war that fueled the Left's opposition here?

Hmmm. Winning!

Also, the grandson of Charles de Gaulle, who lied to paint the French as heroic during WWII - the lie that gives that country the balls to criticize us no matter how many times we come to their aid - he could be in trouble as well?

Duh - Winning!

And, finally, there's a former "left-wing labor union leader" in trouble, too?

Winning! Winning! Winning! Winning! Winning!

We don't know what you're thinking, but you losers out there better get with the program, because this Winning! thing is sweeping the world,...