If Media Reports Are True, These Were Made By U.F.O.s

Truth Is Scary: Vinnie Paz (He's Been Saying It!)

I love Truth Is Scary because they get rappers to divulge the most bizarre conspiracy theories. Here, Vinnie Paz goes off on chemtrails, crop circles, the New World Order, 2012, and Barack Obama as a member of the Illuminati (who can leave out the Illuminati?) all said with the confidence of a true believer - like, if you don't know this shit, then you're the one who's out there. Umm hmm.

Oh well, not a great statement on our education system (will they ever introduce critical thinking?) but one hell of a good time. The truth is scary:

This is what people believe.

We've Got Another Movie: Gawd Bless America

$100,000 is hardly chump change. But 70-year-old Leroy Tessina, a former delivery man, estimates that's the amount of money he's spent on psychics, UFO paraphernalia and other paranormal pursuits over the past few decades. He nearly lost his house in the process.

Among his purchases: several trips to UFO-friendly Roswell, N.M., countless books on extraterrestrials, nearly a decade's worth of sessions with a personal psychic and even a special helmet that supposedly prevents aliens from reading his mind.

But Tessina, a Los Angeles man, said he's a believer no more.

After a mind-bending, life-changing journey with independent filmmaker Blake Freeman, Tessina said he's "reformed" and won't pay peddlers of the paranormal any longer.

"I was into sci-fi as a child and young man and I guess it just evolved from that. I let it rule my life," he said. "Blake told me, 'You screwed up for a while, but now let's go see if we can straighten you out.'

"He showed me the error of my ways, so to speak."

In 2008, the thirtysomething Freeman and the then-sixtysomething Tessina went off on a cross-country adventure to interview so-called experts on alien abductions, ghost hunting, crop circles, psychic healing and more, all in an effort to expose the truth behind their wild, other-worldly claims.

The result is "Gawd Bless America," a documentary opening in theaters March 4, that blends "Borat"-like antics with "Religulous"-like irreverence to reach, Freeman said, something "real."

-- Ki Mae Heussner - on what looks like a hilarious NewAge "spirituality" debunking documentary "Gawd Bless America" - for ABC News.

Where was this Blake guy when I was married?

Shhh: The Secret's Already Out

"I'm not that bothered about anyone's background or who they are, as long as they are open and interested in the subject and willing to discover more.

We spend our energy trying to document and unravel this mystery and if he is interested in joining us then that will be wonderful."

-- Francine Blake, insane founder of England's Wiltshire Crop Circle Study Group, on rumors that pop star and UFO fan Robbie Williams might be moving to a mansion near where Madonna used to live with "lots of wealthy people" in "the heart of crop circle country" (even though crop circles have been reliably, and repeatedly, exposed as fakes) as reported in The Metro.UK.

Man, Am I In The Wrong Economic Class!

More than half of all Americans believe they have been helped by a guardian angel in the course of their lives, according to a new poll by the Baylor University Institute for Studies of Religion. In a poll of 1700 respondents, 55% answered affirmatively to the statement, "I was protected from harm by a guardian angel." The responses defied standard class and denominational assumptions about religious belief; the majority held up regardless of denomination, region or education — though the figure was a little lower (37%) among respondents earning more than $150,000 a year.

-- David Van Biema, explaining why I'm alone in a crowd, even when reading TIME Magazine

He adds:

"This raises the possibility that guardian angels, which famously support an industry of sentimental accessories, are just so darned attractive that they exist in a charmed belief niche of their own."

Oh joy.

If I have a guardian angel, he or she should leave whatever crop circles they're hanging out in, and do whatever they're told at: