Day By Day, Hour By Hour, & Minute By Minute

We're going to try and see this new Nicole Kidman film, "Rabbit Hole", because A) she escaped Scientology's grip, and B) the "Alice In Wonderland" reference, and C) the movie seems to be getting at a lot of things we've noticed about grief. Not just the pain, or the pain of loss, but the pain of loss when you're surrounded by idiots:

Eight months after the accident Becca and Howie are trying to restore a measure of normalcy to their lives — to “cope,” to “move on,” or whatever other banality comes to mind. They are treated, by their neighbors and friends, with a pitying deference that they extend to each other when they are not agonizing (or passive-aggressively squabbling) over just what they should be doing. To stay with the well-meaning language of therapy — an idiom that shadows so many of the conversations in this movie — there are no right answers. And that makes matters worse, especially for Becca, who seems determined to take control of an impossible situation and by magical thinking and sheer force of will repair her broken life.

Yep. No one shallow has anything to say that can help when the big ones hit. And even more important, beyond various NewAge cliche's, now'a'days they don't even try.

We've noticed few will ever do what we ask - they always do and say what they think we want or need (how arrogant is that?) when we've been very clear:

Hit the "donate" button and save the antagonistic NewAge, recovering hippie, therapy lectures on "fear" - that they don't even recognize are antagonistic NewAge, recovering hippie, therapy lectures - for your guru.

Hippies just make bad situations worse.

We got an email from a lovely woman a few days ago, that we sat up staring at last night, still finding it all so horrifying we didn't know how to respond. It said:

thought of you

Hey CMC,

One of my old college buddies is in advanced stages of cancer. I saw his Facebook page today, and he looks like a skeleton. Things are obviously going downhill fast. I scrolled down his wall and read all the encouraging words from the many people who care about him. Then I came to this, and my blood turned cold.

Hey you wish I could make your benefit truly! But you and your family will be in my heart and soul. You are a beautiful, talented and powerful human being capable of anything. Let me know how I can help, YOGA could benefit you a lot. Let me know if you are interested! All the best.

And I just wanted to throttle the stupid bitch. How completely clueless does someone have to be to say such an inane thing to a dying man?

How about so completely clueless "you wish I could make your benefit truly!"? (That line cracked me up!) No, there's no help for such people, they'll just continue their reign of terror, with offerings which are completely alien, destroying anything that remotely feels like normalcy - or says you'll ever get there again. We're sorry. Short of destroying NewAge in this country, we don't know of anything else that will help.

But we do know it won't be yoga.

Thanks for writing.

People who "get" it:

They're the best elixir life has to offer.

Next Up: She'll Hire A Homeopath As Her Doctor

"It wasn't in the stars.

A week after hiring Malibu psychic Aiden Chase to replace Spencer Pratt as her business manger, Heidi Montag announced she'll go it alone.

'I have decided to part ways with Mr. Chase both as a manager and as a psychic and will scrutinize my business decisions more carefully in the future,' Montag, 23, tells PEOPLE. 'I will now be managing my own career as a strong and independent woman.'

Montag says that she had worked with Chase as her 'intuitive healer' for a month after her 10 plastic surgeries in one day before deciding have him take over the job that had been done by her husband Pratt for five years.

'Unfortunately recent behavior by Mr. Chase on set of both Just Go With It starring Adam Sandler, Jennifer Aniston and Nicole Kidman and [on] The Hills have made me question this decision,' Montag says.

Montag didn't elaborate.

As for his behavior, [Aiden Chase] denies reports he crashed the set or tried to poach Audrina Patridge as a client. "

-- Jennifer Garcia, giving credence to the rumor I have psychic powers - I predicted this arrangement wouldn't be working out "in her near future" - or, at the very least, Miss Garcia is confirming that one seemingly crazy nigger can be far more "intuitive" than Hollywood's average "strong and independent" NewAger with breast implants, or, really, any other blithering idiot believer who's ever appeared in People.

Hey - Stop It - He's Stayed Married To Xenu!!!

"Because if there’s one couple whose relationship everyone is jealous of, it’s Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. And before that, Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman. And before that, Tom Cruise and Mimi Rogers."

-- Holly Won't, with news that Scientology's Tom Cruise has been handing out relationship advice - which means he's still acting - but as the Deceiver.

I've actually thought about doing a piece on how famous NewAgers handle their relationships - y'know, how many are divorced, had affairs, betrayed their loved ones. It would have to be a major undertaking, because they all seem to trash anyone that gets close to them. Should I do it? What do you think?

We Are A Tree - Bearing The Fruit Of Evil

This headline in the Modesto Bee got my attention:

Pagan Weddings Attract More Than A Cult Following

But then, with "pagan" and "cult" in the title, it's just the sort of thing that would,...

It seems quite a few couples are taking that big leap with a whole other set of rules, without noticing that human nature doesn't change all that much - including our capacity to point and snicker - and with those get-ups, above, who wouldn't? The Modesto Bee article admits that most people regard pagan weddings as "mystical, bizarre and even evil" but - hey - why let a little thing, like everyone regarding you as "evil", stop you? It'll probably come in handy when you're trying to enroll the kid in school. If this is your kid:

What can be evil about a wedding you ask? Well, let's start with the vows:

According to Wiccans, you don't marry "'till death do us part" but "as long as our love endures", which, I shouldn't have to tell you, could be right until after the wedding when somebody new comes along. That's a lousy deal if you bought a gift for the ceremony. But since Wiccans emphasize the "moral autonomy of women" - not the character-building unity of a couple - what's to stop it from happening? Certainly not a little thing like the man that woman just "married". That idiot doesn't matter. You're "evil", remember?

"Wiccans take a stand against patriarchy and misogyny," says Lloyd Steffen, a religion professor at Lehigh University. They're also into "greater environmental awareness and the higher status of women".

Higher? Higher than who? What kind of a marriage is it where one partner is automatically higher than the other? And the environmental awareness part is a hoot. I, for one, will have to miss your ceremony if it means sitting through another lecture on the need to recycle or the perils of Global Warming.

Sorry, but I'll just have to celebrate your one-sided bond in my own way,...like driving my car as fast as I can while wantonly throwing styrofoam out the windows.

Raven Kaldera, a Massachusetts officiant and co-author of the book "Handfasting & Wedding Rituals: Welcoming Hera's Blessing" instructs her fellow clergy to take gay and lesbian weddings especially seriously. 'For many gay and lesbian couples, this is the only celebration they will get to have.'"

Raven Kaldera has obviously never lived in, or near, a gay community because, if there's one thing they're not short on, it's celebrations.

What do you think Feather Girl, above, is celebrating? Man, I got a lesbian friend that could really show her what to do with that feather: she'd call it "the power of the ancients" and everything!

Speaking of gay couples (and contradicting Raven Kaldera completely) Pete Burns, from the band Dead Or Alive - which in 1985 had the No. 1 hit record, "You Spin Me Round (Like A Record)" - is divorcing his husband/wife/whatever, saying gay marriages are "a total joke"; gays are too promiscuous (No!) and asking "How low is their self-esteem?" (From the looks of things - that's Mr. Burns on the left - I'd say pretty darned low,...) Mr. Burns was married for 28 years to a female hair stylist - I shit you not - who stereotypically "needed to find her own life" (whatever that means) so he went on to marry the guy he now claims broke his collarbone.

If you ask me, it just sounds like more of the "moral autonomy of women" and "as long as our love endures" crap. It's no wonder conservatives are fighting to protect marriage because these fools don't have a clue about what it's for or what to do once in it.

And finally, on the "weddings from Hell" front, according to GlossLip.com, Nicole Kidman, the ex-Mrs. Tom Cruise, “wants her kids freed from Scientology." You can read the rest for yourself but I'll just leave you by making the obvious observation that if she was Wiccan, or gay, she wouldn't be having these problems.

Yea, I know: I'm "evil".

Fabulously Famous For Fraud

"A small group of people in the public eye promote pseudo-science without embarrassment and cannot be dissuaded from it."

-- From a new information leaflet, on the obviously cultish behavior and idiotic pronouncements of various celebrities, put out by Britain's Sense About Science, "a charity founded to increase the public's understanding of scientific issues." [Emphasis Mine]

Madonna (looking good, above) Elle MacPherson, Jamie Oliver, Chris de Burgh, Heather Mills, Stella McCartney, Joanna Lumley, Nicole Kidman, Gwyneth Paltrow, Prince Charles, the late Queen Mother, and various other members of the Royal Family, are all on the Sense About Science list of celebrities who have been told they don't know what they're talking about but still won't stop promoting what The Telegraph calls "celebrity mumbo-jumbo". (I don't know if The Oprah Winfrey Show is broadcast in England but, in America, she would be at the top of this whackjob list.)



Psychological Illusionist Derrin Browne (seen above) was saluted by SAS for his understanding of, and respect for, scientific principals. Master Magician, and anti-homeopathy campaigner, James Randi, of course, is regarded as a genius by all scientists.