Sunday, December 5, 2010

An Overheard Phone Call At A Con Art* Gallery

*Con Art = "Conservative Artists":

Yes, the Left had a nice little show selling lies for entertainment, but - in just two years - it's gotten kind of putrid, and now it's somebody else's turn, don't you think?

Sure, it might have helped if they had called it something like "inter/shame/ment", considering the disgust, and embarrassment all around. But, the truth is, the public just wasn't buying it. I mean, over 12 anti-war films in a row, and they all bombed? Including one where they killed Bush? Get a clue. Yea, the finale worked, for a minute, but it's time for a new direction.

We won't be distracted by what women aren't wearing. We won't be showing tits at all. Won't waste our time.

That whole thing's a statement for knowing nothing now,...well, for doing the wrong thing - like NewAgers changing partners or adopting foreign kids to mess with their minds.

You know, it's fascinating, when you look at it in hindsight - NewAge never did work on adults:

The "green" theme took a while but it fell apart.

We didn't stop eating meat.

Didn't buy your bullshit about anti-oxidents.

Weren't afraid of "toxins".

Didn't take up yoga. Here - try this:

Repeat the incantation "George Bush" as many times as you want - distort his image any way you can - we voted for the guy! Twice! And now he's making a comeback. Amazing. There's nothing you could do!

Mark Twain said a lie will make it around the world before the truth can get it's boots on. You guys just never caught on that a lie has to move fast because, like milk about to turn, it has a sell-by date - and now, time's up.

Oh, surrrre, many people caught on before you did that something stank around here, but oh, as often as GaGa changed her wardrobe, few ever thought it was you guys!

Madonna, or even Cher maybe, but not all of you.

What's that? No, no, see the problem is, when the public is faced with both the truth or a lie, they require an intelligent delivery to succeed; and I don't want to be mean but, let's just say, in the Left's particular case that rarely ever works out well. I mean, let me ask you this:

Will the Kos kids go back to worshipping the zodiac?

Will Hillary go back to talking to the dead?

Will Barack and Michelle continue betraying the idea of the civil rights movement?

After everything I've seen already, I'm not putting money on anything.

Um Hm. Uh huh. Yeah. The fact is, you should've known the truth will always win out in the end, but you've also got to realize it can grow old and withered by the time it's supposed admirers finally come calling - and, no matter if we're dressed or not, those bastards will always come calling - to show how smart they are, now. Speak of the Devil, there goes Arianna coming up the walk! (I can never understand a word that bitch says.) Hang on. Hi, Darling *air kiss* I'll be right with you - I'm talking long distance to San Francisco - no, we're almost done. Put your fruitcake in the kitchen where it belongs.

Now where were we? Oh, yea - the Left, what else? They won't like what they find here on out, artistically, because this isn't a body of lies - it's the truth they abused. But we're still going forward with it, as is. What? No, we won't be serving refreshments, nor will there be flowers in the lobby - no freebies - say again? Well, that's fine because we really don't even want liberals around! We'll probably offer them a chair, for kicks, but it's sure to be one that falls apart! (laughter) Maybe offer them exploding cigars! Whoopi!

I don't care if your friends are currently admiring Julianne Assange's work. Yes, I know, the French like brightly colored graffiti on their neighbor's garage. Whatever.

Look, Julianne's gang signs indicate the whole block is in danger, and, unlike "their neighbors", the French haven't stocked up on guns or good sense so I,...wait a minute.

Oh God, Arianna heard me - she's in there crying. Look - I gotta go - tell the French I said "good luck with that" - we'll call the Germans. Yes, we know how it looks, but we don't care - we'll call them. As far as the rest of them, except for England and maybe Poland, we think it's time to say goodbye anyway. Why? Are you kidding me? Pfft! The "why" is obvious:

They let us spend too much time alone by now, we don't have time for this - we've got our own show of patriotism to get together - and, frankly, the rest of you are getting on our nerves. Goodbye.



  1. Apparently of the Ella Fitzgerald Scat School of Gospel.

  2. Ooops, this comment meant for next post.