Saturday, June 2, 2012

And (If They Go With The "Soap" Idea) I'll Play Benson,...

Today, Ann Althouse made two comments on a post that were just too *RIPE* to pass up - first came this one (emphasis mine):

Remember, Meade and I need to do some road trips for your entertainment, and it's a big deal to do that customized Sprinter to suit the sensitivities of an old lady professor-blogger.

And then came this one: 

We had a fantasy of being more like Clarence Thomas and his wife, traveling about.

I pictured some reverse sitcom credits - "with Clarence Thomas as Meade" - and died laughing, though Meade as Clarence Thomas would be just as funny:

"My grandfather beat me,..."

Ann and Meade are off, in their own little vacuum-sealed-with-money existence (a Sprinter? Really?) so I wouldn't go trying to cross-reference it with the reality of Walmart, that CT and Jenny enjoy, too quickly. If anything, I'd say Ann and Meade ought to start off slow - like with whatever they'd consider a cheap air mattress in the backyard - and then try working their way down. Real Americans will laugh at them otherwise.

So what can Ann and Meade do, instead, or until they're ready? 

Well - since my enjoyment is such a major concern of theirs - here are Crack's Top Ten Suggestions For What Meadhouse Can Do To Keep Me Entertained:

10) Meade can start showing up to Wisconsin protests in obnoxiously colorful sweaters because he and Ann have re-imagined themselves as the Huxtables.

9) Meade as Marian Berry ("The bitch set me up!")

8) Blackface: Meade's Obama, Ann's Michelle,...wait - that's not much of a stretch,...

7) They buy the Sprinter, and the two of them criss-cross the country, recreating scenes from the Vietnam War's My Lai Massacre. (Extra credit if they make a special stop at "Roswell.")

6) They do whatever they see on an old episode of MTV's "Pimp My Ride" - complete with hydraulics - THEN they go visit the RV campgrounds.

5) Meade is Anthony Hopkins. Ann is Jodie Foster. This is Silence Of The Lambs. Action!

4) Three words: The Beverly Hillbillies.

3) Billarry or "Soap" - pick one. Ann and Meade may interpret them as they like.

2) Since they both like Mitt so much - strap a dog to the roof of anything and just GO!

And Crack's Number One Suggestion For What Meadhouse Can Do To Keep Me Entertained:

1) Tell everybody they're going to see Mayan temples - but they really visit all the Mormon ones!


  1. Haw! Some of your best work. (And I'm not just saying that because it features... ME!)

  2. They should take you up on these suggestions. They would be fun.

  3. Meade seems pretty popular with a number of the ladies that comment at Althouse, so maybe they could put on their own version of Big Love.

  4. I see your hypertensive mind has been working OT, lately, good show, Crack. Road trips always have infinite possibilities.. BTW, sorry, I really should stop by more often--from look of recent posts looks like you've been especially "creative" as of late, lol.

  5. Jesus is only a red belt? Plus, it looks like a vuvezela free-for-all in Heaven. No thanks Jack.