Based on nothing, Ann Althouse has said she doesn't "think" there's such a thing as brainwashing.
Of course, Ann Althouse has been brainwashed a long time:
While America was traumatized by the televised explosions, murders, and manhunt for the Boston bombers, 25-year-old "Connie" was recovering from her own trauma in an Athens area treatment center.
Her five-month stay in a Nigerian cult-camp has given her a different perspective on how Tamerlan Tsarnaev, 26, and his 19-year-old brother Dzhokhar may have committed to a killing-cause.
"My heart actually kind of goes out for the young guy who, as awful as it is, I believe you have to be totally mind controlled ... to do something like this at the age of 19," she said.
"You don't just do something like it for the sake of it."
We interviewed Connie at Wellspring, a cult-deprogramming retreat near Albany, Ohio.
She asked to use a pseudonym as she's involved in an investigation of the organization she was in.
While the wooded retreat shielded her from much of the national coverage during the events surrounding the bombings, she was able to view some television and hear about the latest from her counselors.
The answer to the question of "why" being asked by most touched by the bombings comes easy for her.
At the age of 19 herself she was led to a cult in Lagos by her mother in an attempt to curb her rebellious spirit.
Though that experience was six years ago, she found herself continually depressed by the experience.
Yes, oh yes, we must always curb "rebels". Oh man, just wait until Connie gets out of Wellspring:
She'll find encountering the blogosphere to be just as depressing, if not more so.
If she thinks being in a cult was rough, she'd better prepare herself for being out of it:
Those in positions of authority, and who should know better, will really send her off the rails,...
Ordinarily, I would agree that marriage is for life, but on a couple of occasions I've witnessed people in truly toxic marriages (granted, they should have been wiser, or their friends and family should have given them better counsel -- but sometimes that doesn't happen). I could never put my finger on it, but now I kinda get the drift that they essentially fell victim to spouse/gurus and since our society puts such a high regard on "nice" (to a man and woman, their spouses gave off creepy "super nice" vibes and were so damn "perfect" that they could have posed for GAP or Ralph Lauren catalogs, to a person each man/woman that got away from these "nice, successful" monsters was blamed for the breakup and told they were fools for letting go of such "catches".
ReplyDeleteIt would have been better if they'd never fallen for those monsters they got hitched to in the first place, but sometimes life does not work out that way -- I can't harsh on them for a do-over there if they find somebody whose a bit less plastic and a lot more real and can make a real go at a real marriage (way I look at it: they were always faithful to the concept; they just allowed themselves to get pressured into the con -- a con which our society fully endorses, so what else can we all expect to be the product?); I'm also glad if their scars from that first go round didn't completely ruin the second one. I'm guessing it would be a tough go, since trust issues have got to be pretty big.
So while I do have issues with lack of seriousness in regards to marriage vows, by the same token I can't get too at people like that who can find what they should have had in the first place. Just wish fewer people went through that, that's for sure.
PW
*now the ones who marry for the "cool" factor or some shit and then get out of it because "it didn't fulfill me" -- ahh, fuck them!
Not me - I think marriage is pretty clear-cut - and you put your finger on it:
ReplyDelete"Their friends and family should have given them better counsel."
That's before and after they get hitched. Marriage is a community endeavor - it specifically has witnesses for a reason - but I saw how everybody stands around when the worst happens, choosing "sides" like there is one, and it sickened me. My "friends" offering to kill my wife and her "friends" - assisting in her "affair" with the quack after her mother's funeral - doing everything in their power to treat me like a monster. And then, just like with my marriage, it took the courts - divorce and otherwise - to unravel it all years later. Kinda.
As any person involved with cult shit will tell you, aside from losing a child, there is NOTHING more wrenching than being frantic with concern over a spouse's mental health, their being taken advantage of, etc., and having to face the barriers society's placed in your way to even being seen in that light. (Those parents didn't save their daughter from a cult, she's an adult held by kidnappers,...) It was - and is - nothing but life-destroying bullshit.
I don't see marriages that "break apart" but a society unwilling to state what's-what and stand by it. Decline is a choice, right? Well, today, one of those choices is to never tell a woman she's wrong. 70% of divorces are (supposedly) initiated by women, making it clear to me they can "believe what she wants to believe," merely become "dissatisfied" (as you said) or whatever, but destroy their families, and make everyone connected to the union suffer the life-long consequences - all with the backing of the state - but without any pesky questions about anything but where the money goes. And they're not too careful about that either, as long as everybody gets their cut.
Which is why the push for gay "marriage" is so farcical - nobody gives a fuck.
Marry today, divorce tomorrow - ha! ha! - let's all be Zsa Zsa Gabor, like that ho wasn't a walking punch line. Even to Johnny Carson. Am I not supposed to notice this stuff - or just talk about it?
Look, when I knew nothing about divorce but heard my friend had cheated on his wife, and now was asking me to be part of his alibi, I told him no, flat out. We were family, spent holidays together, showed our weaknesses, shared each others secrets. His wife was an integral part of that. It simply didn't compute. (I told him to shave his head and beg for forgiveness.) In over 20 years, I have seen not one person - in what was our tight-assed circle - since that divorce.
Again, all because I was the only person to say "no, you're wrong."
Apparently you have to blow people up, or something like it, for everybody to come to that agreement nowadays,...
I think we're probably arguing a different slant to much the same thing -- one problem (the big one) I see is that society has placed a lot of shallowness as premium grade A stuff...and a lot of heartache and messed up people are the result. (for the record I have not met one of my examples, man or woman, that initiated the breakup -- I just think the survival instinct kicked in finally and they didn't fight it -- which was good for them).
ReplyDeleteAnd it doesn't make for actual, you know, marriages.
PW
*and sometimes the best thing you can do for anybody is tell them they are wrong (so best be for fixing it, if possible) -- being a good friend, and a loving family member means sometimes playing the heavy, but to go along to be all pleasant and positive is really a coward's way out...and really freaking asshole-ish
That's another thing we all need to re-learn.
...and while I have seen it, I have to admit that not being raised in it can cause problems for me in comprehending some things.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, women will definitely get told they are wrong (of course the women never had a problem telling the men that either -- which is one of the reasons most people in my family stay married...they KNOW there aren't a lot of people out there who are going to put up with them, so better hold on to the one you've got!hahaha).
PW