Art: Sticking Your Tongue Out And Shaking Your Ass

There's really nothing higher to reach for,...

Random Finds (All Found Completely By Accident)

Religion Is Outdated (But Stupidity's In Style)

This guy's getting arrested for reading a book. I know - it's a "holy" book - but still. He's getting arrested for reading a book.



These Sikhs are involved in a turf battle. One guy took a shot to the face with a cricket bat.

A lot of good religion's doing any of them.

Hat Tip: iOwnTheWorld

Kevin Smith Is How Real People Talk And Think (Dealing With Spiritual Fruitcakes And Beliefs)

He talks like I do,...



He thinks like I do,...



He tells stories like I do,...



Of spiritual people screwing him around.

The Double Standard: Gays Can Say Anything

Oh yeah - let a rapper speak and you'd think civilization itself was falling, from the reaction,...



"Oh my Gawd, he said the word 'bitch' and you know you can't allow that,..."



Rappers must be stopped at every turn, with public campaigns and denunciations from politicians,..



Meanwhile, all over the nation and the world, gay people have been saying anything and everything without anyone making a peep,...



Don't get me wrong:

This is not a call to shut gays up, or to make new rules,...



Unless the new rules are to shut up hypocrites in Western society.

Extra credit - I've actually seen this happen:

Earth Day Is Bullshit/Mingus Would've Loved It

This post is just a placeholder while I get something else done - I'll continue with the series on cultism when I return,...

Songs About Killing The Bitch - Part I

I'm going to be dropping a few of these on you over the course of the day, because it's a topic I think is worth addressing:

Whatever happened to songs about killing the bitch?

Or, rather, whatever happened to songs about wanting to kill the bitch? You know, nothing with the kind of seriousness you hear in Hendrix's "Hey, Joe", or the countless male/female threats and beatdowns you can find in Rap ("Wear the wrong color outfit/can get your mouth split") but just a general kind of, almost lighthearted, if-you-fuck-up of a warning song? Did they disappear with the rise of feminism and the metrosexual? I know women have made them, because I did a post on them (I'll find it for you and put a link in a later edition of this series) but what's happened to the men? Or am I missing them?



Of course, I'm not part of the whole Grrrl Power thing, because - let's face it - I can kick the ass of 99% of the girls out there, so the very idea was a joke, everyone pretending women were strong, protected by laws and a culture designed to hem men in to allow women to act like fools at everyone's expense (Oh shit, Rush is discussing the founder of Earth Day killing a woman - figures). There were, and always have been, tough women (Annie Oakley, Calamity Jane, etc.) so all feminist culture did was allow the female versions of male jerks free reign. But did the Grrrl Power thing also destroy the Kill The Bitch song? If you've got a comment, or a suggestion, let me know:

I'll keep the rest of you posted.

I Can't Close My Eyes/New Romantic Shit/80s

"When a man is asleep, he is no better than if he were dead; and he who loves life and wisdom will take no more sleep than is necessary for health."

I'm having insomnia issues, and they're throwing my schedule all off (check out the time signatures on the previous posts). I don't need a whole lot of sleep, five hours tops usually, but when I find myself up at 6AM and I haven't made it to bed yet, it's pretty clear the next day is going to suck a little, probably with mental issues and a nap making everything screwy.

The difference, between the clock on the wall and my body clock, is very real.

"There is no use of a sleeping man, as there is not of a dead man. ... But whoever of us is most solicitous for living the true life, and for entertaining noble sentiments, will keep awake for as long time as possible."

I'll have all these brilliant ideas and then - *poof* - they're gone, so I've got to remember to write them down,...if I can remember to write 'em down. I've got brain farts, skips in time, and a need for constant backtracking. I'm being extra careful while driving. It's all very tiring. Not like drugs. No, it's nothing like drugs.

Not like the ones we were doing back then.

"Come - come on in. It's not - it's not like that. Down - down we go. Fall through - fall through the crack."

When I was young, in the '80s, I could stay up for days at a time - three or four, easy. Riding in cars filled with ants and empty fast food wrappers. Holes in my jeans. Cowboy boots - with spurs. I had to drink myself to sleep because I just wasn't going there. Sleep was for the dead, and it still is, compared to those of us who have work to be done. Creativity requires diligence. That guy or gal standing sentry on the fence. If you're not awake or aware, shit'll get past you.

Everybody's crashed out now.

"I stopped sleeping and I consider that the grandest tragedy that could occur. At all hours I walked the streets like some kind of phantom. All that I have written much later has been worked out during those nights."

The first show I did in the 80s, before anything had started for me, I did with a German named "Z-Snot". He had teeth that looked like Dresden after the bombing. (I'm probably going to lose mine early, so I'm one to talk.) We'd rehearsed this show for weeks, staying up for outrageous amounts of time, getting our moves down ("Alright, you do this and then I'ma do this, and then you reach under my arm,...there!") and coordinating 5 turntables with keyboards before we'd ever heard what MIDI was or anything. Then we finally got onstage and he forgot everything as soon as the music started, abandoning all that preparation for momentarily hogging the spotlight and acting out to the point of catastrophe. (You've only got a "show" when you're actually doing something, right right?) The crowd was polite until he fell off the stage, blinded by the lights and propelled by adrenaline. We went from cool to fools in minutes.

I never want to hear boos again.



(This is a remix, which I'm not crazy about, but I couldn't find the original - and the guy's dead now - so I'm running with it anyway.)

"You enter into a conflict with the whole world, with sleeping humanity. You no longer feel like one person among others, because others live unconsciously. One develops a demented pride. One tells oneself, 'My destiny is different, I know the experience of the uninterrupted vigil.' Only pride, the pride of a catastrophe, gives you courage then. One cultivates the extraordinarily flattering feeling of no longer being part of ordinary humanity."

I was sporting five small very tasteful and cool orange day-glo mohawks at one time back then, because - though I loved the machine music of New Wave - I was a Punk, and the lead singer of The Exploited had everyone beat for height. So FIVE mohawks. Oh yeah, I was so fucking hard. Spikes and everything. A human porcupine.

Listening to New Romantic shit on the sly.

"Insomnia, you ... in a single night grant more knowledge than days spent in repose, and, to reddened eyelids, reveal yourself a more important event than the nameless diseases or the disasters of time! ... I appealed to philosophy, but there is no idea which comforts in the dark, no system which resists those vigils. The analyses of insomnia undo all certainties."

Like kids today, I never imagined I'd grow up, or could become the person I'd be, writing this. I didn't even know what "divorced" meant, and definitely couldn't picture myself married. I guess I'm lucky to have never had kids. I lived for late nights, and music, and Johnny Rotten had already said there'd be "No Future" so who was I to doubt it? Getting both my ears pierced, with a red hot needle, was more important than getting older. It proved I'd endure. And I have.

Just not the way I thought.

"We begin to live authentically only where philosophy ends, at its wreck, when we have understood its terrible nullity, when we have understood that it was futile to resort to it, that it is no help."

Now I'm on some new and improved shit, shaking off everything that's ever held me. Including Punk, and old fucked-up friends, and apparently sleep. I'm working on music but it's coming from a whole different place, incorporating everything I've ever known, every style I've ever heard, all of it. I can't go wrong with music. I'm just as cocky as I've ever been. I know who I am. All I've got to do is stay alive.

But now, that's clearly easier said than done.

My Sister's So Cool/Anguished Bellyaching/60s

My beautiful sister, Marva, has a great ear for music, which isn't surprising because we come from a musical family and she and I both have music careers. But what gets me right now, and the reason I wanted to do a post, is that her music selections can make me practically travel back in time to the '60s, without making it seem like that generic acid-tinged day-glo poster everyone else attempts to conjure.



This is the '60s as I remembered them, when I was a boy, aware beyond my years but with a view that was limited in scope. I didn't know what a hippie was, and though sex showed up early, drugs were still a long way off. Men drank beer, or whiskey, and the women wore sun dresses. Black people were so concerned with their image we dressed up to go to the supermarket. "Funky" was a really bad word.



Martin Luther King was alive and many men wore coveralls as a uniform of the Civil Rights Movement. The insurance man was a "very important person", warranting the dispersal of children and displays of silverware. We hid in silence from Jehovah's Witnesses. We took naps to Billy Graham.



Collard greens were grown next to rose bushes. I thought an iguana was a dinosaur. There were 13 kids in the foster home, with 5 dogs, several chickens and ducks, and a rabbit. We caught an opossum, and stared at his ugly ass all day, but he "played possum" and escaped that night. My foster mother ran down armadillos skittering from the gutters. She caught snakes with her hands and killed them with a gardening hoe.



(I'm only including this song, above, because it's co-written by my sister's good friend Jimmy (OO Soul) Holvay.)

Everyone kept plastic on Living Room furniture, and kids were forbidden to enter there except on special occasions. My Auntie Bessie's was considered extremely glamorous because she decorated it in blue. It was rare that we'd enter her home through the front door, and when we did it felt like someone had died.



One of my sisters had a crush on Elvis which seemed very weird. My cousin Ricky, who was lighter than the rest of us, owned a 45 of The Beatles that nobody would let him play. The old man had nude pinups of white women in the garage. We were forbidden to look at them and thought they were very exotic.



Everybody loved Bobby Kennedy and there was a profile of Abraham Lincoln in every house. Jesus suffered, hauntingly, on his cross at the top of the stairs. We kids ran by him as fast as we could, just to avoid his gaze. It never worked because we looked.



The Three Stooges, The Little Rascals, and I Love Lucy seemed to always be on television, interrupted occasionally by I Spy (with Bill Cosby) The Man from U.N.C.L.E. and Lawrence Welk. I don't remember when Petticoat Junction came on, but Bonanza came on Sundays. Cartoons started at 7AM, on Saturdays, and occupied a world of their own.



A family friend, Chester Moore, thought it extremely important that all the foster kids learn how to shoot pool, so he'd take us to the billiard parlor and teach us to aim. He got our Christmas tree cheap by saying we were orphans. He said he never saw a woman as beautiful as Cher. Chester drank too much, but he was the only one.



Momma R. made an outstanding peach cobbler, and, if you were going to McDonald's she'd ask you to pick her up some "hambuggies". Taco Bell sold "Tacahs". Jack In The Box just sold Jack In The Box.



My foster mother knew one dance, The Shotgun. She'd use her fingers to make pistols and when she "shot" us we'd laugh. She once fell off a Merry-Go-Round that had started moving while she was trying to secure me to a horse. I never got over the guilt and brought her gifts until the day she died.

On Faith Healing, Fishnets, And Featherdusters

I lost a friend of 20+ years today, for being "negative" and "mean" about meditation and chakras, which just reinforces for me how selfish people become when they enter the delusional world of the NewAge. Friends, family - nothing must come between them and their stupid beliefs. ("God is a ham sandwich" is a belief - you gonna cop to that?)

Take this creep, Braco The Gazing Healer, that Howard Stern is talking about above:

Women are throwing themselves (and their money) at this loser with a bad haircut and no one - no one - can talk them out of it.

And all he's doing is looking at them! (Let any other guy do that and they'll be ready to file a restraining order.) Speaking of stupid shit you can't talk women out of, let's go to Toronto:



Hear! Hear! Way to go, Canadian women! You are the epitome of intelligence! Now that we've got THAT out of the way, will someone please begin convincing those cows that French maid outfits are the ultimate in "empowerment" please? Braco? Come on, dude:

Your fellow man is counting on you!



Hat Tip: iOwnTheWorld and the Skorpion!

Ladies & Gentlemen: Here's Bedlam & Mayhem!

That Noose Should Fit Snug (You Worked On It)

YOU DON’T SAY: Obama Embraces Policies He Opposed As A Candidate.

Dear George, You Were Right, I Was Wrong, Let’s Do Golf… Sincerely, Barack.

And

TMR Flashback: The Macho Response: GEORGE W. BUSH

TMR Flashback: BWAAA-HAA-Ha-HA-HA!!! Who's "Stupid" Now?

TMR Flashback: Better Than His Critics. Period.

TMR Flashback: It's Not All About How You Want To Look At It.

TMR Flashback: George Bush Doesn't Care About Black People.

TMR Flashback: I Will Always Remember The George W. Bush Years As The Age When I Was Forced To Stand Up To The Many Irrational Demands Of The Mob.

Truth Is Scary: Vinnie Paz (He's Been Saying It!)

I love Truth Is Scary because they get rappers to divulge the most bizarre conspiracy theories. Here, Vinnie Paz goes off on chemtrails, crop circles, the New World Order, 2012, and Barack Obama as a member of the Illuminati (who can leave out the Illuminati?) all said with the confidence of a true believer - like, if you don't know this shit, then you're the one who's out there. Umm hmm.

Oh well, not a great statement on our education system (will they ever introduce critical thinking?) but one hell of a good time. The truth is scary:

This is what people believe.

There Ain't No God (And It Sure Ain't A Female)

Except for the part about no woman being able to fuck things up this bad, I pretty much agree with the late George Carlin's take on religion (Of course the witches applaud the feminist line, because they suck, and think we have short memories). If you don't agree with the atheist position, then maybe a little reminder of the extent of "God's Love" will come in handy. Here's also some video of Muslims punishing gays - don't chicken out now - and please, while you're watching it, remind yourself where God was for these poor bastards, since you're so sure he existed at all:



Hat Tip: Know Beliefs and iOwnTheWorld

"Get Along, Sweet Little Woman, Get Along,..."

This is lame Maryland Democratic Rep. Donna Edwards, lamely trying to be cool by quoting the lame "Effect and Cause" by the (sometimes great) White Stripes on the House floor. It's totally lame. If I was a politician, I would've immediately jumped up to the mic and started quoting "Train Kept A Rollin'" right back at her:



Yeah, she would've thought "I was a real cool jerk,..." LOL!

This Is The Stupidest Dance Ever Invented

Obama is another jackass who can't quite grasp that, while we're listening to him, we're not taking him seriously:

Part of the problem is that the American distrust of intellectualism is itself not the irrational thing that those sympathetic to intellectuals would like to think. Intellectuals killed by the millions in the 20th century, and it actually takes the sophisticated training of "education" to work yourself up into a state where you refuse to count that in the books. Intellectuals routinely declared things that aren't true; catastrophically wrong predictions about the economy, catastrophically wrong pronouncements about foreign policy, and just generally numerous times where they've been wrong. Again, it takes a lot of training to ignore this fact. "Scientists" collectively were witnessed by the public flipflopping at a relatively high frequency on numerous topics; how many times did eggs go back and forth between being deadly and beneficial? Sure the media gets some blame here but the scientists played into it, each time confidently pronouncing that this time they had it for sure and it is imperative that everyone live the way they are saying (until tomorrow). Scientists have failed to resist politicization across the board, and the standards of what constitutes science continues to shift from a living, vibrant, thoughtful understanding of the purposes and ways of science to a scelerotic hide-bound form-over-substance version of science where papers are too often written to either explicitly attract grants or to confirm someone's political beliefs... and regardless of whether this is 2% or 80% of the papers written today it's nearly 100% of the papers that people hear about.

I simplify for rhetorical effect; my point is not that this is a literal description of the current state of the world but that it is far more true than it should be. Any accounting of "anti-intellectualism" that fails to take this into account and lays all the blame on "Americans" is too incomplete to formulate an action plan that will have any chance of success. It's not a one-sided problem.

If you want to fix anti-intellectualism, you first need to fix intellectualism and return it to its roots of dispassionate exploration, commitment to truth over all else and bending processes to find truth rather than bending truth to fit (politicized) processes, and return to great, foundational humility that even the press could not overplay into hubris. And they need to drop their blinders whereby they excuse away the damage that intellectuals have done while ignoring these ancient precepts and only crediting themselves their successes, because it cuts themselves off from the very object lessons that could help them return to this time-tested approach to science, which they still flatter themselves that they follow. If you fail to fix the intellectuals first, then all your effort to fix "Americans" is going to fail; you'll bend your efforts towards getting them to look at intellectuals seriously, but they'll end up coming to the same conclusions they already have about the value of intellectuals and you'll have wasted your shot.

I'm not holding my breath.

And why should we? Especially now that we stupid folks - the real Americans - are getting the upper hand? Remember when I used to speak of the opposition and Alice In Wonderland, back in the New Dark Ages, and I told you they're nothing but a deck of cards? Well now we've fully arrived, and can see through their lies, so all they've got left is to flail. Or I should say, all the Left has is to flail.



And flail they will. Enjoy the show.

Hat Tip: iOwnTheWorld

Jon Stewart Has His Fun: "I Don't Want To Live In A World Where Charles Manson Says What Our Children Can Watch On Television" (Cute)

The Daily Show
Tags: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook

I'm going to update this with text, in a bit, so check back for that. This is funny stuff, but should hardly be the last word on Glenn Beck, conspiracy theories, and how secularists should approach what seem like some of the "out there" investigations going on in this country, such as Beck's. (Remember: he's a Mormon, while I'm an atheist.) For now, I'll just say I think people need to remember The Daily Show is a comedy program, and that's enough reason to trust what they say less than anything FOX News's resident bible-thumper did:

Beck, as a believer, has to say what he thinks is the truth. Jon Stewart, as a comic, just has to make you laugh.

I'll be back - and thanks for the donations. You've saved my ass again.

The Daily Show
Tags: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook

UPDATE: So, while Jon Stewart is going on and on about everything that's easy to mock about Beck, he's conspicuously, and conveniently, leaving out the White House scalps Beck collected, and the level of political interest he inspired. He's also leaving out the fact that, though The Glenn Beck Program won't be on FOX, Glenn Beck will, in some capacity, so - along with his excellent radio broadcast - liberals will continue to be stuck with him, whether they like it or not. My take:

Liberal applause, now, many be somewhat warranted, but, to me, it still seems waaay premature.

The Daily Show - Barack Obamayan
Tags: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook

And finally, as an atheist who gets deep into religion and spirituality, it seems disingenuous for Jon Stewart to knock Glenn Beck for his Book of Revelations nonsense by twisting it up with 2012 and the Mayan calendar, when Stewart has to know Beck is a conservative Mormon - commenting on that Leftist spirituality nonsense. All it makes me wonder is why Jon Stewart never says anything about, say, Louise Hay's influence on PBS? Actually, I don't have to wonder why, because the answer is obvious:

PBS is for and of the Left, so they can spout all the NewAge nonsense they want, and Stewart won't say a word about how crazy they appear.

But that's fine - as I said, the man's a professional clown, and his mandate is to make us laugh - so, as long as he's being funny and Beck & Co. are kicking his and the Left's NewAge ass, we should occasionally be able to give Stewart a pass because, in the larger scheme of things, the joke is definitely on him.

Which is yet another topic he'll never discuss on The Daily Show.

Dumb-Dee-Dumb-Dumb-Dummmmmmmmmmb!

So much for being nice. And let's hear it for voodoo, shall we?

The voodoo grandma who stood by while her 6-year-old granddaughter was set ablaze in a bizarre demon-casting ritual was sentenced to three years in prison on Wednesday.

Sylvenie Thessier was led from a Queens courtroom in tears after Justice Richard Buchter scolded her for not getting Frantzcia Saintil medical attention.

"That child deserved to be cared for and deserved to have her wounds treated," Buchter said.

Thessier, 71, pleaded guilty to reckless endangerment for the June 2009 incident.

The child's mother poured rum over her head and lit her on fire to drive out evil spirits - and Thessier only doused her with water and put her to sleep, prosecutors said.

Thessier, a native of Haiti, admitted she was negligent. "But I didn't do it on purpose," she said.

Man, you guys love this shit. You weren't trying to kill her, dearie, you did it because, in the year 2011, your dumb ass still believes in "evil spirits" - lock her up. Throw away the key. Let's do lunch, her treat.

I mean, why do women even deal in religion?

That's never made sense to me:

Former President Jimmy Carter says much of the discrimination and abuse suffered by women around the world is attributable to a belief "that women are inferior in the eyes of God."

Carter said such teachings by "leaders in Christianity, Islam and other religions" allow men to beat their wives and deny women their fundamental rights as human beings.

But rather than saying, "To hell with this!" women will either try to change religion (good luck with that) or they've invented their own wacky shit.



Both approaches are the height of stupidity. Just drop it.

One of India's best-known spiritual leaders, famous for his apparent miracles and long list of influential followers, is on life support in a southern hospital, officials said on Tuesday.

Satya Sai Baba, 85, who has devotees in more than 100 countries, was admitted to a hospital funded by his organisation in the town of Puttaparthi with lung and chest congestion on March 28.

His condition has since deteriorated and he is now on a ventilator and is receiving kidney dialysis, the most recent health bulletin from the hospital said on Tuesday.

He remains "critical," although his "level of consciousness has considerably improved" and his vital systems are "stable", said the update from the Sri Satya Sai Institute of Higher Medical Sciences.

Yeah, like all the rest, the old pedophile can do every trick in the book - especially fooling the lamers - but he can't perform the most important one:

Saving himself.

You fools will catch on one day,...

Ann Barnhardt To Our Senator Lindsey Graham: "You Stupid, Stupid Jackass,...Why Don't You Come Here And Hold Me Accountable, Player?"

This woman is my new hero - she's walking the walk and (like this blog) talking the talk, the way it should be spoken. Ad homenin attacks? Yeah, like any real American, she's got your ad homenin attacks. (I hate how the so-called "smart" people online act like they've won an argument because their opponent called them a name - pussies. You're still wrong.) Facts? She's got facts up the ying-yang. Fire in the belly? Yowsa - this lady's got more than enough fire in the belly:



"Go back to Hell where you came from." Yep, even as an atheist, this is the America I want to live in. Where people know their shit and are more than willing to defend it. Ann Barnhardt has more balls than many men today - definitely more than Lindsey Graham - and, as an average American citizen, is the living embodiment of what we all should be shooting for. We are not a genteel people, despite the best efforts of our so-called "betters", and, as far as I'm concerned, I want the entire planet to see it:

Because, despite what the NewAgers say, by not being pushovers, this is the only way we're ever going to truly "save" it.

And oh yeah, if you ask me, this should've been Glenn Reynolds.

I Am The Only Intelligent Person On The Planet (And No One Else Understands That Because,...)

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