Friday, May 30, 2008

My Bad: I Guess I'm Just The Wrong Guy

"There is a real focus on men, and on what women do to men: Women don’t forgive men. Women don’t think about men and their feelings. For as sensitive as the modern man is supposed to be to a women’s feelings and as sensitive as a man is supposed to look, he’s not really supposed to register an opinion. Or slip up. Or be honest."

-- Kathryn Jean Lopez, describing themes from the new Sex And The City movie, in the National Review

Talking Through That Whole On My Neck

Fine. I'm done. You knew it was going to come to this, didn't you? I named the blog right. Look at the title again.

Or here, let me lay it out for you, nice and simple like:

You're. All. Fucking. Wrong.

I've been dancing around saying that for such a fucking while, even I've wondered what's taken me so long.

You're wrong. All of you. You don't know shit, and what you think you know isn't worth much, because you're not sure.

I'm sure. You can hear it in my voice - even in the voice I write with: I'm sure of everything I'm fucking saying, and what I'm saying most loudly is YOU'RE WRONG.

Let's start with the so-called "big stuff": there is no God. I'm not going to fight with you about it, or try to prove otherwise, because there's no point: there is no God.

Let Richard Dawkins pull together his PowerPoint demonstration for you, making the "atheists" proud in the face of your stupidity. That's not for me. I'm just going to state it as plainly as I can, one more time, and move on:

There-is-no-God.

Wait a minute - I'll go a little further: Constance Cumbey, you're a lawyer, and the fact you waste your time chasing NewAge nonsense to justify "Biblical scripture" is below you, and everyone who hears you. You're no different than that silly woman who "facilitates recovered memories" and claimed John Bolton (the U.S. Ambassador, not the treacly musician) yelled at her 20-something years ago. You all need to stop. Now. Get a life. Get a real one. Jesus doesn't need you anymore.

Oh, and while I'm at it (and before I move on) a quick message to my ex-wife who thinks (giggle) she's a four-eyed god: you almost got me, Bitch. But now I think I've finally got you figured out too - you're crazy.

A lot of people tried to tell me that but, silly me, I cared so much. Well I'm over it now. I'm going back to my music, played loud, and if I get it right, you'll hear it in whatever damned "spa" your already-dead ass is forever trying to "relax" in. That's the way I want it, that's the way it's going to be: noise, noise, noise, for the rest of my days. A real racket.

O.K. - I feel better now. Let's move on:

I've already told you McCain's going to be president, so you might as well drop the Obamamania now, because he ain't gonna do it. He ain't "The One". I'm the one:

I'm black, I'm post-racial, and I don't give a shit.

That's what you're looking for.

There's only one problem: I'm not running. Nope. No way, Jose. Anybody who thinks I'm "presidential timber" don't know shit about wood. I got "the right stuff" but the wrong attitude. Why? Because I'm disappointed in all of you and don't want to do it. Didn't I just have to tell you there's no God? Now who in the fuck wants to lead a bunch of idiots who couldn't figure that one out? Oh yea: John McCain.

I'd let him if I were you.

Music sucks. I'ma do what I can to fix that, but right now it sucks, and you people really should demand better. Go to Dylan's house and complain. Rip up the tombstone on Jimi Hendrix's grave - do something. Because if you have to rely on me to save you, with my attitude, your ass might be waiting a mighty long time.

If I have to wade my ass through another group of musicians, it's only going to be because I want to do something, and, considering the way I feel, I just may change my mind. I definitely won't be doing it for you. I'm 47 years old, and the idea of a 47 year old man - especially this one - trying to make somebody happy, depresses me. So, I don't know, throw money or something. There's a donate button over there: use it. Or be left to your own devices for "happiness." I'm all wrung out.

Art? What's "art" now? Bronze statues of Oprah? I don't think so. That's spectacle, just like those Kate Moss Yoga poses, Banksy getting cute, and whatever Michael Jackson's done to his face. Doesn't qualify.

Nothing does. It's over.

Women? What about women? Just asking that question - putting the word "women" with a question mark next to it - is enough to piss 'em off, so who cares?

Didn't they get the memo? I'm hereby declaring all insane people "insane," so if they've already bought their Sex And The City tickets, then damn it go, GO! Leave me the fuck alone.

I'm working here.



Thursday, May 29, 2008

Somebody's Lying (And It's Not Me)

This is Cody Hall as a baby. The doctors in England told her mother there was nothing they could do for her. She would have to grow up like this, with gigantic tumors growing on her face; end of story.

Her mother brought her to America.

This is Cody Hall today, age 15, and going to the prom. She had 15 surgeries, paid for with donations.

I wonder what she thinks of "socialized" medicine?

This Generation's Definition Of Achievement

It's so fucking sad it hurts to look at it.

A Great Deal (On A Work Of Genius)

Down on the lower-right-hand-side of this blog, there's a link for the self-produced Rap's Creation: Planet Rock, my critically acclaimed (and anti-war) CD from a few years back. I sell it through CDBaby - and now, digitally, through a site called Amie Street.

Anyway, as an introductory offer, Amie Street is giving $5.00 worth of free downloads to anyone who signs up! So, if you've considered buying my "genius" CD (or any other music you can think of) here's your chance to get some good tracks on the cheap:

JUST CLICK HERE

P.S.

I've been told a close-up look at the cover, alone, is worth the price of admission: there's *something* about artists who keep bottles of urine in the bedroom that does it, every time,...

NewAge's Karma Is To Never Be Forgiven

A recent survey of 300,000 people in China found:

70.3% will "never forgive" Sharon Stone for her "karma" remark.

20.5% do not accept her apology because "it was not sincere".

8.7% think an apology is useless and it is necessary to observe Stone's actions.

0.6% are satisfied by Stone's apology.

I think the important lesson for NewAgers is that, when an earthquake destroys one's life and no one can help them - whether it's actual or a metaphorical one caused by NewAgers - those who get hurt are under no obligation to forgive.

NewAgers, seeing themselves as "nice," are silly to think they'd somehow be spared the wrath of hard-wired human emotions, like hatred, or jealousy. Those emotions are a major part of who we are. To demand that anyone (who doesn't buy into NewAge's store-bought philosophy) forgive those who have hurt them is not only mean but cruel. It adds insult to injury. Obviously, the Chinese (who know a bit more about the concept of karma than the average Westerner) don't share in the naive-yet-damning Hallmark Card version of Buddhism propagated here in the West.

Sharon Stone's original comment included her saying, "I don't think anyone should be unkind to anyone else," but, by it's very rule-changing-without-the-need-for-consensus definition, that's exactly what the NewAge outlook is designed for: NewAgers are one of the only groups on the planet who spare themselves the trouble of doing an emotional inventory of the pain they cause, since they teach themselves to "move on" from such things; not deal with them realistically or in a responsible manner. I have no doubt that, as long as Stone can stay as far away from China as possible - and not lose too many endorsement sponsors - she'll never think about the harm she's caused it's grieving citizens again. That's all NewAge is designed for: learning how to be emotionally ruthless.

Look at Oprah. She's been informed, countless times, that what she's been doing for years now upsets traditional Christians (and others) which - as a so-called "spiritual" person - should give her pause. But it doesn't. She's "moved on" from such a petty concern as other believer's feelings - even if (as she herself has said) she used to share their religion.

All the people who have been harmed by the quackery she endorses, or whose marriages have crumbled because she introduced a "new paradigm" into it, they mean nothing to her, as long as her profits (that's money, folks; supposedly the opposite of a spiritual person's worth) can justify her actions to her followers and herself. And those who have been hurt suffer, alone, while watching the glamorous Oprah collect accolade after accolade for her "work." Is it any surprise that, to many, it's the work of the Devil?

As someone who is now divorced from a NewAger, I'm not ashamed to say I still do a daily accounting of my own actions (Did I try to love her enough? Did I work hard enough? Did I grow more in love, as the years went by, or did I grow cold?) The only answer I keep coming back to is that, whatever my faults - and, believe me, I have them - I was open with her. I rarely hid my feelings or actions. I didn't believe in it. I made agreements with her and stuck to them. And I damn sure loved her. She never had to suffer the repeated shock of betrayal I did, except where she decided - completely on her own - that her desires should come before ours as a couple. Those things never ultimately worked out as she planned. And there was no way they could bring us together in failure, because I didn't have a clue she was acting on her own.

It was only when I found a duffle bag of cassettes, featuring recorded conversations between my ex and her "spiritual advisors," telling her "'good' is when you get your way and 'bad' is when you don't," that I finally understood my marriage was never something she and I shared together. It had been interfered with, from the very beginning, and that interference had worked on us for the entire 20 years.

Many of the "enlightened beings" on those tapes, who had never met me, told her I had "brain damage" and even that I should be "hit over the head" because "he's strong, he's a man, he doesn't believe in the planets." If anyone had told me my wife was brain damaged, I would've kicked their asses (and I figured my wife was weird: I just never knew where her nonsense "healing" claims and such had been coming from.) But she, on the other hand, just laughed, nodded along, accepted those "feminist" occult bleatings as truth, and paid the fee for both of us.

Now I, alone, have to pay the price.

There really was nothing this "strong man" could do, when she was allowing such evil people to set my life's agenda as well as hers, and in a culture enamored enough with such idiotically superficial ideas to wallow in them. That's something it seems impossible for those outside my marriage to grasp.

And it's, still, probably the hardest fact for me to swallow too: that she went to them, paid them, and believed them - until it swallowed us, both, whole - inevitably turning our hearts inside out, and our purest distillation of love into one of the darkest pools of hatred. And, by denying this is what's occurring, others are playing a role in the foundation of our culture's destruction, making whatever cracks exist much, much, larger. Considering the deception at NewAge's core, how could it turn out otherwise?

I'm just one guy, but I'm hoping, maybe, one day - with the help of 1.3 billion Chinese residents driving NewAge's counter-productive message home - the beautiful-on-the-outside Sharon Stone, at least, may be able to figure out just how ugly NewAge beliefs can make someone on the inside, and decide to do something about it. (Her husband is the editor of the San Francisco Chronicle, a newspaper in a cult-infested city:) As we all know, "it's only what's on the inside that counts."

And that's probably the only Hallmark Card-type "truth" that's really universal.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

A Message To The Quacks

Cartoons, Politics, Delusions, And Rims

Above is Scott McClellan. He is a cartoon. Here is actual footage of Scott, being a cartoon, at his former job:



Funny stuff. Whoo-hoo! Those were the days. They just don't make 'em like they used to. You know, Bugs Bunny and stuff. Now Bugs was wacky.

O.K., now this, my friends, is Karl Rove. He's a real person. (Notice the animated 3-D quality, as compared to that photo of Scott: it's a giveaway.) Below is Karl at work, delivering Nazi propaganda through an organ of the Bush Administration, clearly smearing Richard Armitage, who never already admitted he was the leaker in the Valerie Plame Case:



See? Scott McClellan is a cartoon. So, what have we learned? I'll tell you: if you're going to mix cartoons into your real life - and you have a choice - stay away from Scott McClellan, and start watching Aqua Team Hunger Force, or something else weird, like this:

Well, well, well: according to Slate.com, writer Susan Neiman is "an American philosopher who runs the Einstein Forum in Potsdam, Germany, [who] worries that American progressives have drifted away from the values and intellectual traditions of the West, stretching from classical antiquity to the Enlightenment,.." which, if you ask me, would definitely explain the popularity of this guy:

And nonsense like homeopathy. Come on, Democrats, you don't want to be thought of like those Kenyans who burn witches, do you? Let me rephrase that:

You don't want me to have to set you on fire, do you?

Timothy McCall , an M.D. and yogi (or Boo-Boo) says "Yoga practitioners aren't waiting for the medical community to tell them what they already know." and "Yoga teaches us that the most reliable source of information is your direct experience."

And since I've never set a Democrat on fire,...

Speaking of setting people on fire, here's yet another scene from the red-hot R. Kelly Sex Trial:

[Sha'Dawn] Young looked at Melanie Ijaoba. They'd met that morning on the bus to the courthouse.

"When you were 15," Young asked, "how many older men came at you?"

"Lots."

"Did you have sex with them?"

"No," Ijaoba said. "Because God said no."

Young laughed. "I went to a Catholic school and God said no."


[Which TMR finds to be the: Worst. Excuse. Ever. But let's continue. Ladies:]

Both women said there are two kinds of older men who hit on underage girls. One is "Chester Molester."

"He's the one the girls don't want to be around," Young said, "who doesn't have the cool clothes. For girls to want you, you have to have the cute car with the rims."

"The cell phone and money in the pocket," Ijaoba said.

"You buy the girl a pair of gym shoes," Young said.

"A pair of jeans," Ijaoba said.


Got that, guys? American girls, raised in the feminist era, are giving up the nappy dugout for some gym shoes and a pair of jeans. Now - somebody - remind me why Oprah opened a school in Africa again? Oh yea, because of "empowering" scenes like this:

"AH, sweet, blessed memories of childhood. Steaming herbal tea. Hippie language police. Friends who had same-sex parents. Feminism, politics and books debated around the kitchen table every night. Also, Annie Baker said she used to wonder, precisely why were the typewritten fliers, push-pinned up in the local health food shop, 'always Xeroxed on purple paper with those little tear-off tabs at the bottom?'"

Yea, I've wondered about all that myself. But that was a long time ago. Now I want to be a foreigner! What can I say? I'm a macho guy and I don't fit in anymore. Hopefully the film, below, will explain everything:



So Even His Uncle Is A Communist



Oh, Obama: the Red Army liberated Auschwitz, you ninny.

Humping Home: From Hay To Hamburg

Did you hear? Jon Blyth is starting a reverse-Louise Hay Fan Club:
"Hi. I don't know if you've heard of me, but I'm the best. I can do anything I want to, and I attract only love. This is because I am a creature of love. Not only that, but the more love I give away, the more I have. Basically, I could fill a barn with vibrations of love.

If I ever heard these words tumble from a mouth, I would pop off and make a cup of tea, just so I could come back and drop it in horror. People know it doesn't make sense, that's why meaningless, self-congratulatory rubbish like this is usually hidden away. People who hurl upbeat but confusing imagery at themselves usually keep it restricted to a bedroom mirror.

The quotes from the first paragraph were based on genuine affirmations by Louise L Hay, author of books detailing the powers of self-actualisation and, if her Amazon reviews are anything to go by, commander of a devoted legion of empowered fragile souls. I dislike Hay,..."
Oh goodie: where do I sign up? (And doesn't Louise Hay have a creepy I-eat-children smile?)

Did you know there's a connection between the twisted views of Louise Hay, Sharon Stone, Al Gore, and that crazy preacher, Joseph Hagee? Check it out:
"I heard Gore on NPR the other day. He was asked what he made of evangelical pastor Joseph Hagee's absurd comment that Hurricane Katrina was God's wrath for New Orleans' sexual depravity. Naturally, Gore chuckled at such backwardness. But then the Nobel laureate went on to blame Katrina on man's energy sinfulness."
Paging Constance Cumbey. Paging Constance Cumbey,...Will Constance Cumbey report to the White Courtesy Telephone, please:

Miss Cumbey? God told me to tell you to set up a debate, between Al Gore and the President of Czechoslovakia, Vaclav Klaus. (Above) God says it's something about the Green Agenda. God also says he'd do it himself but he's too busy making me blog.

The White House is going after the New York Times because - honestly - it's becoming painfully clear I don't have that kind of pull. If I did, they wouldn't write articles for the fashion section that start like this:
"JILL BOLTE TAYLOR was a neuroscientist working at Harvard’s brain research center when she experienced nirvana.

But she did it by having a stroke."
Then, all of a sudden:
“That’s it,” the therapist said. “That’s it, and that’s big.”
Her therapist? That Queer Eye For A Stroke Guy. (Yea, I know: booo! Back off, I'm trying something new here:)

Next up: A lady moved to France. Her husband had an affair. She didn't like it. Told you: those people are crazy.

And finally:

Is Homeopathy "New Science" or "New Age"?

I hear it's just water, but nobody's sure, because leading British pharmacists sell it. We are sure Yoga and horoscopes can lead to possession by the Devil, but you'll have to ask the Germans:

They've known more about the NewAge than almost anybody.