The World Looks Different When You're Fed Fake News (Vs. Real Headlines)

FAKE NEWS: Tom Cruise, 58, is 'DATING Mission: Impossible 7 co-star Hayley Atwell, 38, after filming brought them closer'

REAL HEADLINE: Tom Cruise, 58, is a dangerous cult leader, who tries to FUCK every female that will let him - and, being stupid and immoral starfuckers, they let him. Who cares about all the previous divorces, previous heartbreaks, and even previous dead women? No one - but especially not other women - when they're "in heat" (HYPERGAMY) for Ol' Tom and his money.

FAKE NEWS: Connie Chung, 74, says her ABC rivalry with Barbara Walters and Diane Sawyer 'was not unlike what Tonya Harding did to Nancy Kerrigan', admits chemistry with David Letterman and calls Hugh Grant 'unfriendly' in tell-all interview

REAL HEADLINE: Connie Chung, 74, says her ABC rivalry with Barbara Walters and Diane Sawyer was your basic silly, unethical bitchy cat fight - carried out by adults, in public, while claiming they're feminist examples for future women to be proud of - and she's also proud to be one of the reasons David Letterman wears a beard now, to hide his embarrassment after being forced to apologize to his wife, and the public, for not being the person he's presented himself as, but, actually, the kind of low-life who would flirt (and probably fuck) a married woman, who's always acted like every newsroom's Chinese crew slut. Hugh Grant is probably smart to avoid the likes of them both.