Thursday, March 24, 2011

What Paris Hilton & Halle Berry Got In Common

Goddammit, knocked out of the running for stork sex again:
“HILTON: I went out with that guy last night.

STRAUSS: Which guy?

HILTON (points to an actor in “Saving Private Ryan”): We were making out, but then we went somewhere where it was bright and I saw that he was black and made an excuse and left. I can't stand black guys. I would never touch one. It's gross. (pauses). Does that guy look black to you?

STRAUSS: How black does a guy have to be?

HILTON: One percent is enough for me.”
Shit. Does this mean my entire sexual history is going to be filled with crack whores, NewAgers, and Digital Underground's leftovers?

For the record, the black guy was Vin Diesel (who is probably trying to hide somewhere right now) and Paris Hilton ain't no racist. She's an idiot, and a liar, who says and does stupid things - like publicly getting passed around for shits and giggles and calling it "empowerment" - but definitely not a racist.

Get it straight, folks! She's trying to help humanity, "spiritually", remember?


  1. Wait wait wait. Vin Diesel is black? I thought he was an outer space potato alien.

    "The more you know"

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  3. Sure - like climbing the ladder of success, when you start off on the top rung, is that hard. (Compared to, say, a 50 Cent or Jay-Z, she's done nothing - they, on the other hand, have "come up".) I'll give her props for legitimizing celebrity blow job videos (who knew?) but past that, I can't say much in her favor. Sure, she brought the Hilton family name into the new millennium, but, I betcha, they were happy with it just being known on hotels and not in them.

  4. Until her BJ video, she was just one of many hundreds of very rich LA club sluts... Her famous last name, so what. I read something -- if I really cared I'd research it, but I don't so I'll just post an impression as if it were true -- that she'd been virtually cut off from her family money.

    So, that being the case if it's the case, more power to her. She's not only making a living by being an idiot but by being an idiot in such a public way she's telling her parents and grandparents, "fu<< you"

    Don't get me wrong, I'm no fan--she represents most of what wrong with media in the last 80yrs. But in the world of attention-getting, she has accomplished a great amount while having almost no ability other than attracting people who want to fu<< her.

    Now, maybe that's sort of like saying "he's the tallest ice hockey player in Paraguay" but still, someone is the tallest ice hockey player in Paraguay.

    At least Halle Barry is genuinely hot.